How to Hype Up A Bro

WEBVTT

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free audio post -production by alphonic .com

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Hey, welcome back to The Shane and I Show. My

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name is Shane. My name's Max, and my dog eats

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ass. It was coming. I knew that one was coming,

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because I'm sitting over here, and I'm watching

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your dog hump a stuffed dinosaur. Yeah, and then

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eating the ass out of it. And your dog is a female

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dog. Yeah, she is. And then she comes over for

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pets after she eats ass. Yeah. She wants you

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to tell her she's a good girl. That's part of

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her thing. That's her kink, you know? She's got

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that praise kink. She's got the praise. Yeah,

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she wants to eat ass and then be told she's a

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good girl. You're a good girl. No, she's going

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to death. Yeah, she's really having at that thing.

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No, she doesn't realize that she's a girl though,

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right? Uh, I don't, I don't think dogs have genders

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in the same way we do. Yeah. She's probably just

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fluent like that. Yeah. It doesn't matter. She's

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just horny. They just, they just do what they

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do. Yeah. Hey, this is the podcast about nothing

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that makes you think of something and let's get

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our sponsors out of the way We're only doing

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one sponsor this week. All right. I am waiting

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for coffee So well you you can still say I don't

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want somebody ordering coffee and then and then

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me not having any so I'm just gonna hold off

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We're coming back. I just got I'm waiting for

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a shipment. All right I don't know what's going

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on with the shipping lately, but Anyway, Black

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Label Supplements, if you're still into your

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new year, new me, it's March by now. So if you've

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stuck it out from January to March, congratulations.

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Hell yeah. That's the way to go. And you're still

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looking for some good supplements. Go to blacklabelsupplements

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.com. They got everything you need there. They

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got some protein powder, some creatine. I just

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recently started using their creatine and it's

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good stuff. I heard something about creatine

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making your brain better. Creatine does a lot

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of really good stuff. It's like the most studied

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supplement there is. Is it really? Yeah. So it's

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pretty safe. Like I've had no weird side effects

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from it. I remember the first time I was in high

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school, I was in high school the first time I

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heard of it. I've never taken it. Back then it

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was just like take creatine the week before a

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lifting competition. And that was it. That was

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all you would do. Now you do five grams a day.

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Five grams a day. Yeah. And you get unflavored

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and then it's fine. That's what I do. I do an

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unflavored, I mix them in with a protein drink

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and check it down. All right. Cool. Go to that.

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Anyway, blacklablesupplements .com. Use code

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Shane15 to check out, save yourself some cash.

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And if you're still out there doing, getting

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your new year, new me on, go for it, man. Yeah.

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Get going. Fucking do it. Cause it brings me

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to something. There was a couple of things I

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wanted to talk about today. Yeah, was one of

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them a dog eating ass? No, now your dog's just

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staring at it, dude. At the ass. Yeah, at the

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ass. She's wondering if she wants to eat it or

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hump it. She's just trying to figure out what

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her next move is. I don't know why it's so funny,

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but it's like a play -by -play of dog's little

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dog, Max's little dog, humping a stuffed dinosaur.

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She's a little five pound Yorkie poo. And she's

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humping a, what is that, a T -Rex or? No, it's

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a brontosaurus. Brontosaurus. She's humping a

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green brontosaurus. Green brontosaurus. I wonder

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how that guy feels. Yeah, me too. He probably

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feels violated. I mean, honestly, I bought that

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thing with the idea in mind that she was just

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going to hump it and eat its ass, because I know

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my dog. I know what she likes. I know what she

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wants. She likes eating your ass. Yeah. Does

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she eat other dog's ass, though, or is it just

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stuffed animals? Just stuffed animals. Well,

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there you go. Yeah. Everybody's got a pig, man.

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Even dogs. Yeah, everybody's got a thing. Everybody's

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got to go by the judge. Yeah. But yeah, man,

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so the other day, I was getting something. I

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was just getting something at a gas station.

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I was getting a snack or something. I had change,

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right? This is the first thing I want to talk

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about, because I felt like an idiot. I had change,

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and I paid for what I was going to get, like

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a drink and a protein bar. Yeah. With all the

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change there, because I had a shitload of change,

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and I was like, I gotta get rid of some of this

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change. Yes, we all do it. Right? The fucking

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line, because the lady's counting it hella slow

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at the register, the line's backing up. And everybody's

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mean mugging me. And I'm just sitting there,

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I'm like, what do you want me to do, babe? Well,

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I'll say this. It wasn't a busy time of day,

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it was like nine o 'clock at night. Okay, so

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she was just like you went in you paid with change

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Yeah, it wasn't supposed to be a big and she

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was so bad with the change Well, she had a line

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developed I counted it to her like here's four

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quarters. Here's another four quarters. Here's

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another four quarters Yeah, and then she had

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to count it again. How old was this person? She

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was young probably 18 19 see that's my guess

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because they've never fucking had to use change.

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Yeah Anyway, you know what it made me feel like

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what? And maybe you feel like that person that

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still goes to, like, grocery stores or whatever

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and still tries to write checks and just holds

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up the line because nobody knows how to process

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a check. Process a check anymore and everybody's

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always, and you're always looking at that person

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like, dude, who uses checks? Like I use checks

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in certain situations. I have never in my life

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gone to the grocery store and paid with a fucking

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paper check. I did it a long time ago because

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that's how you paid before like ATM cards or

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whatever. Yeah, but you're a very old man. Yeah.

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You're ancient. Thanks. Yeah. But yeah, that's

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how I paid. I mean, that's how you paid for it

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back in the day. That was the quick and easy

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way. Do you know how old you are? Yes, I'm 53.

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Let me tell you how old you are. You're so old

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that when you were born, Afghanistan was a vibrant,

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thriving country. Yeah. Now it's a shithole.

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Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. That just sounded bad. No,

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no, that's true. Somebody's gonna get offended.

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Yeah. Anyway, Ty, and yeah, so that was my thing,

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man. I just felt like an asshole for paying with

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change. Like everybody's looking at me. One guy

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was even like, why do you gotta pay with change?

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And I'm like, dude, and I thought to myself,

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I didn't say it, but I thought to myself, I was

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like, because it's just sitting in my goddamn

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car and I have like eight bucks worth of change.

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Yeah. Why wouldn't you pay with change? I'm not

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going to go to a Coinstar, cash it, and then

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pay with cash. Yeah. If it was, if it was a busy

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time. Yeah. Yeah. Don't, don't pay with change

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during a busy time. But, but really, you know

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who they should be pissed off at? Is the change

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lady? This fucking 18 year old girl who never

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learned how to count change in her life. This

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is the first time she's ever been confronted

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with having to count change. Yeah. In her whole

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goddamn life. And I guess it's not her fault,

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but - No, it's not. Cause they've changed a bunch

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of stuff. It's wild. They've changed a bunch

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of stuff over time. Like math is different now.

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I've, I've heard about that. Like I was like

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math is like, it's like people are like - But

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the way I used to do it was you do the big number

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on top, like subtraction. You do the big number

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on top, the small number on the bottom, and you

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figure it out, right? And I was doing math that

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way one day. Yeah, you carry the wand and all

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that. Yeah, and I was doing math that one day,

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because I was trying to figure something out.

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And one of my coworkers was like, that's a weird

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way to do math. And I'm like, what do you mean?

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This is just subtraction. That's how you do math.

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This is how math is done. Yeah. Things like that.

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Yeah, you're right. Things like that make me

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feel hella old. Yeah. Right? But these people,

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these children, they spent their whole lives

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paying with fucking cards. Yeah, and apps. And

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apps and shit. And if they ever used cash, if

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somebody tried to hand them coins back, they'd

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be like, no, that's your tip. I don't want to

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touch that. I don't know what it is or how it

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works. And it's been somewhere gross. Yeah. And

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and though it's a fact that every coin in circulation

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has been in at least three people's butts It's

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still money, you know, it's still buddy still

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money. Yeah, it's still paid for my protein bar

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and my drink Yeah, so and she even got frustrated

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at the point where she only took like four dollars

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and gave me a dollar back And I'm like, I think

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that's wrong and she's like, it's okay. You're

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holding up the line. I'm like, okay This bitch

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doesn't know how to count change. I remember

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being in school, being in the fucking first grade,

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and one of the activities we had is they would

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hand us a bunch of fake plastic coins. Yeah,

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and you had to figure out how to do it. because

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it's a basic skill. They used to have things

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like, they used to have electives in high school,

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like typing and home economics. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Where you learned how to cook and shit like that,

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so you weren't a fuck, you weren't a fuck. Yeah,

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they don't do that shit anymore. Yeah, that's

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how come we have people that are being fucks.

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Yeah. It's like that weird kid that huffs a black

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marker all the time, all of a sudden created

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an app where you don't have to fucking, you know.

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He got frustrated in home economics one day from

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huffing his black pen Yeah, and he was like I'm

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gonna create an app to where people don't have

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to we people could order food Yeah, and they

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don't have to worry about learning how to make

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a cake. I'm gonna be completely honest with you

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I don't think it was the guy who was fucking

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huffing his pens in home ec who made that app

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I just don't think that guy was the way that

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guy became a serial killer that That guy, the

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app was made with that guy in mind, but it was

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not made by that guy. That guy became a weirdo.

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That guy became a weirdo. That guy became a weirdo

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who has issues. That guy is still sniffing pens.

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Sniffing pens and watching reality TV. Watching

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reality TV. Every now and then he goes down to

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where he used to go to high school, where he

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had home ed, he just leers at the girls. He just

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burgs in the back park a lot. Just like a creepy

00:10:13.629 --> 00:10:18.620
old dude. Everybody knows somebody like that.

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Everybody knows somebody that's like this weird

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dude, and you know why weird people exist? I

00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:26.539
was watching this thing, this Crystal Lea stand

00:10:26.539 --> 00:10:29.120
-up comedy special. Okay, yeah, well that's a

00:10:29.120 --> 00:10:30.879
good place to learn real things about the world.

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But he was talking about weirdos, and he's like,

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you know how people become weird? How do people

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become weird? It's from parenting. Is it? Yeah,

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like if your parents just cheer you on for all

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the weird shit you do. Right, you're never corrected.

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You're never corrected. You think that you're

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fucking everything is fine. Yeah, when you're

00:10:51.259 --> 00:10:53.100
actually acting like a weirdo and you grow up

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later and you realize what you thought was normal

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is not normal and all of a sudden you're like,

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oh my god. I think that is one way that weird

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people get made. Right. I think another way is

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there's some people that don't give a fuck. Yeah.

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And they're just like - Those people are almost

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alright. Yeah. You know what I mean? Cause you're

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just like, you know, look at that guy. He just

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doesn't give a fuck. That's cool. Like he knows

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he's weird. That person knows they're weird.

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They admit they're weird. You're like, yeah,

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it was just, this is the way I am. I count my

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steps. I fucking, you know, like not like count

00:11:25.149 --> 00:11:27.230
your steps like calorie wise, but like count

00:11:27.230 --> 00:11:29.669
how many steps it is to you till you get to the

00:11:29.669 --> 00:11:34.429
tour. Yeah. Well, that's like a fucking. Pathology

00:11:34.429 --> 00:11:37.029
there. Yeah, that's a that's a fucking mental

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illness and there's plenty and that's the third

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way people get weird Yes, they have some mental

00:11:41.710 --> 00:11:45.110
pathology. Yeah. Yeah Anyway, speaking of weird

00:11:45.110 --> 00:11:47.090
this probably brings me the other thing I want

00:11:47.090 --> 00:11:49.789
to talk about I'm thinking about this the other

00:11:49.789 --> 00:11:52.269
day because we went a couple episodes. We went

00:11:52.269 --> 00:11:56.210
kind of hard on the bros Like talking about workout

00:11:56.210 --> 00:11:59.230
shit. We do tend to go hard on the bros, especially

00:11:59.230 --> 00:12:02.649
the alpha bros. Yeah and lately the bros are

00:12:02.649 --> 00:12:05.429
starting to find out that the alpha bros aren't

00:12:05.429 --> 00:12:08.830
real. They're starting to open up. Right. To

00:12:08.830 --> 00:12:11.110
the fact that these alpha dudes, they're just

00:12:11.110 --> 00:12:13.490
posers. They're just posers. They call themselves

00:12:13.490 --> 00:12:16.710
alphas online. And they're really not. But yeah.

00:12:17.289 --> 00:12:21.289
And it got me thinking, right, the bros are feeling

00:12:21.289 --> 00:12:23.629
down lately. Yeah. Because there's a difference

00:12:23.629 --> 00:12:25.669
between, like, I think there's a difference between,

00:12:25.669 --> 00:12:28.210
like, bros, because bros are always gonna go

00:12:28.210 --> 00:12:31.309
along with, the bro is always there. A dude is

00:12:31.309 --> 00:12:33.769
some guy that's like, he knows how to handle

00:12:33.769 --> 00:12:36.129
his stuff. He's a dude. You know what I mean?

00:12:36.669 --> 00:12:39.330
The difference between a bro and a dude, right?

00:12:39.450 --> 00:12:42.090
Doesn't need a bunch of people around him. Like,

00:12:42.169 --> 00:12:44.129
it's okay being by himself. He's just a dude.

00:12:44.450 --> 00:12:46.250
Just a dude. Just a dude. You see him, you're

00:12:46.250 --> 00:12:49.370
like, hey, it's that dude. A bro you know because

00:12:49.370 --> 00:12:51.330
he has a bunch of people, right? He needs people

00:12:51.330 --> 00:12:53.289
around him. He's always got his bros. He's always

00:12:53.289 --> 00:12:56.529
got his bro. But the bros are feeling down lately,

00:12:56.809 --> 00:12:59.179
Max. because they're finding out all the shit

00:12:59.179 --> 00:13:01.320
in the world. All the shit in the world. That's

00:13:01.320 --> 00:13:03.559
not good. That's not good. It's not good. I've

00:13:03.559 --> 00:13:05.639
been noticing at the gym I go to, like, the bros,

00:13:05.679 --> 00:13:08.299
they're not hyped up. They're not hyped up like

00:13:08.299 --> 00:13:10.340
they used to be. No, they're not like, yeah.

00:13:10.820 --> 00:13:13.379
So it got me thinking, like, how do you hype

00:13:13.379 --> 00:13:16.879
up a bro? Tell me. Like, we gotta hype up the

00:13:16.879 --> 00:13:19.980
bros. So this episode is for the bros. I do know

00:13:19.980 --> 00:13:22.519
one way to hype up bros. How's that? I'm gonna

00:13:22.519 --> 00:13:25.500
come at you hard with this, but it works almost

00:13:25.500 --> 00:13:27.440
every time. Don't take what I'm gonna say. No,

00:13:27.500 --> 00:13:29.919
no, I won't. What? Unless you were gonna say

00:13:29.919 --> 00:13:33.080
this, but pre -workout. Pre -workout does hype

00:13:33.080 --> 00:13:35.120
up bros, but that kind of levels out. They get

00:13:35.120 --> 00:13:36.960
their protein, they get their caffeine, they

00:13:36.960 --> 00:13:39.440
get their taurine. And they're good to go, and

00:13:39.440 --> 00:13:41.019
they're hyped up, and they're in the car, they're

00:13:41.019 --> 00:13:43.840
blasting my little creed. Yeah, exactly, exactly.

00:13:43.919 --> 00:13:48.279
Can you take me higher? Yeah, yeah. And they

00:13:48.279 --> 00:13:51.059
get all hyped up in the car? Yeah. Fucking Chumbawumba

00:13:51.059 --> 00:13:54.049
comes on. That works for the single bro. Okay.

00:13:54.350 --> 00:13:55.909
All right. That works for the bro that's like

00:13:55.909 --> 00:13:58.889
the captain. The captain. The bro captain. Yeah.

00:13:58.950 --> 00:14:00.750
All right. All right. But what about the bros

00:14:00.750 --> 00:14:02.870
that need hyped up? You know, they come in, they're

00:14:02.870 --> 00:14:05.230
like, I'm feeling a little down. They don't know

00:14:05.230 --> 00:14:07.049
how to process that shit. The bros that can't

00:14:07.049 --> 00:14:09.250
self -hype. Yeah, and they can't process that

00:14:09.250 --> 00:14:11.710
shit. You know what I mean? They can't say, I'm

00:14:11.710 --> 00:14:13.549
feeling down. They're just saying, I'm not bro

00:14:13.549 --> 00:14:16.190
enough right now. Right. You know, I'm not broing.

00:14:16.389 --> 00:14:19.990
Right. Your shit's cracking me up. I'm sorry.

00:14:20.169 --> 00:14:24.029
It's meant to be wild. So I figured out the ways

00:14:24.029 --> 00:14:26.210
to hype up a bro. How do you hype up a bro? Here's

00:14:26.210 --> 00:14:28.769
the first way. All right When you see a bro,

00:14:28.809 --> 00:14:30.730
here's what you say to him. All right, and you

00:14:30.730 --> 00:14:32.730
got to say it like this Yeah, you got to see

00:14:32.730 --> 00:14:38.370
just like this. You gotta say big dog Big dog.

00:14:38.590 --> 00:14:40.529
Yeah, like you see that one bro. That's kind

00:14:40.529 --> 00:14:42.509
of off to the side. That's not really vibing

00:14:42.509 --> 00:14:45.070
Yeah, he's not really being over you you go up

00:14:45.070 --> 00:14:50.399
to that guy and you say Big dog. Big dog. And

00:14:50.399 --> 00:14:53.460
you watch his whole fucking, but like with any

00:14:53.460 --> 00:14:56.279
guy, if you walk up to a guy and you just say,

00:14:57.019 --> 00:15:00.500
big dog, his whole fucking demeanor changes.

00:15:00.759 --> 00:15:03.340
You're right. Like you get, you get actually

00:15:03.340 --> 00:15:06.039
hyped up. If I, if I was just like sitting in

00:15:06.039 --> 00:15:08.759
the corner, fucking feeling down, sniffing black

00:15:08.759 --> 00:15:11.720
paint, sniffing, sniffing fucking markers and

00:15:11.720 --> 00:15:14.019
shit. and somebody walked up to me and was like,

00:15:14.440 --> 00:15:16.759
big dog. You put down those fucking markers.

00:15:17.120 --> 00:15:19.639
I put down those fucking markers. I'd stand up.

00:15:20.379 --> 00:15:22.700
Give me that bench press. Yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah.

00:15:23.059 --> 00:15:27.080
Yeah. You call anybody big dog, any dude, big

00:15:27.080 --> 00:15:29.480
dog, and his whole fucking demeanor is going

00:15:29.480 --> 00:15:31.600
to change. All right. All right. I like it. Does

00:15:31.600 --> 00:15:35.559
it also work big cheese? That was another one.

00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:38.919
Big chief. Big chief. Oh, chief. Yeah, big chief.

00:15:39.200 --> 00:15:40.320
Chief is good. You got to see it with the same

00:15:40.320 --> 00:15:43.440
inflection on it. Big chief. You gotta say it

00:15:43.440 --> 00:15:46.940
like that. You gotta say, big chief. Big chief

00:15:46.940 --> 00:15:49.460
works. Big chief. The other one that I like,

00:15:49.460 --> 00:15:51.559
that works too, is when a dude walks in, when

00:15:51.559 --> 00:15:54.700
a guy, when a bro walks in to a room and you

00:15:54.700 --> 00:15:57.960
notice him, you go, there he is. You gotta snap

00:15:57.960 --> 00:16:00.559
the finger. You gotta snap the fingers and point

00:16:00.559 --> 00:16:05.259
at him. There he is. There he is. There he is.

00:16:05.500 --> 00:16:09.399
Look at him. That's the guy right there. That's

00:16:09.399 --> 00:16:11.639
the other one that works too. That's the guy.

00:16:11.700 --> 00:16:15.360
That's the guy. You know, I have to say the there

00:16:15.360 --> 00:16:18.779
he is thing. That's one that I use. But the context

00:16:18.779 --> 00:16:22.820
in which I use it is when I like, I see something

00:16:22.820 --> 00:16:25.179
and I see someone, I want to acknowledge them.

00:16:25.360 --> 00:16:29.059
But I realize I don't remember their name. That

00:16:29.059 --> 00:16:32.039
works for me too. I do that when I can't remember

00:16:32.039 --> 00:16:35.519
somebody's name and I'm like, there he is. But

00:16:35.519 --> 00:16:38.919
it also works for the bros. Yeah. Cause the bros

00:16:38.919 --> 00:16:41.669
get automatically hyped up. When you say things

00:16:41.669 --> 00:16:47.049
like, big dog, or big chief. Big chief. There

00:16:47.049 --> 00:16:50.429
he is, is the one that when you're like, you

00:16:50.429 --> 00:16:53.029
haven't seen the bro in a while, and he walks

00:16:53.029 --> 00:16:55.509
into the gym or something, you're like, there

00:16:55.509 --> 00:16:57.250
he is. You snap the fingers, you can give him

00:16:57.250 --> 00:17:00.029
a point. Yep. And he's like, all of a sudden,

00:17:00.230 --> 00:17:02.750
he's just like, yeah, and fucking slams down

00:17:02.750 --> 00:17:05.539
his pre -workout. Yeah. and he's fucking good

00:17:05.539 --> 00:17:07.680
to go. There's a guy at work who does that to

00:17:07.680 --> 00:17:10.500
me. Yeah, he's like, oh, there he is. Or he calls

00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:12.599
me Star Trek, because I have a Star Trek tattoo

00:17:12.599 --> 00:17:15.000
on my leg. He's like, hey, Star Trek. Does he

00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:17.339
get you hyped up, though? It does, yeah. Yeah,

00:17:17.460 --> 00:17:19.339
see, little nicknames for bros, get him hyped

00:17:19.339 --> 00:17:21.720
up. Yeah, I'm certain this guy does not know

00:17:21.720 --> 00:17:23.900
my name. That's the other reason people do it.

00:17:24.779 --> 00:17:27.079
Little sayings or little nicknames for dudes

00:17:27.079 --> 00:17:30.359
really hype him up. So if you're like out there

00:17:30.359 --> 00:17:32.650
and you're trying to hype up a bro... Throw out

00:17:32.650 --> 00:17:34.430
a little of McDame, it'll hype him up. Don't

00:17:34.430 --> 00:17:37.809
do anything weird. Don't call him, don't call

00:17:37.809 --> 00:17:41.190
him Pin Hut Black Pin Huffin'. Oh, there he is,

00:17:41.349 --> 00:17:43.650
Huffin' That Black Pin. There he is, Huffin'

00:17:43.650 --> 00:17:46.650
That Black Pin. You don't wanna do that. All

00:17:46.650 --> 00:17:48.670
right. But you wanna say, there he is, gettin'

00:17:48.789 --> 00:17:52.470
ready to pump some iron. Ah, just say throw to.

00:17:52.789 --> 00:17:55.390
There he is, gettin' ready to throw down. There

00:17:55.390 --> 00:17:57.210
he is, gettin' ready to throw down. That could

00:17:57.210 --> 00:18:01.210
mean just about anything. Big. I like Big Dog

00:18:01.210 --> 00:18:04.869
a lot. Hey, Big Dog's good. Big Dog. So basically,

00:18:05.049 --> 00:18:10.170
the way you help out a bro is feeling down, is

00:18:10.170 --> 00:18:15.309
to say some non -committal, enthusiastic thing

00:18:15.309 --> 00:18:18.089
at them? Yeah. All right. Yeah, because you don't

00:18:18.089 --> 00:18:20.509
want to, you got to get them hyped up. You know

00:18:20.509 --> 00:18:23.029
what I mean? Because what's the world without

00:18:23.029 --> 00:18:27.589
bros? Oh, it's still the world. But it's not

00:18:27.589 --> 00:18:31.859
as entertaining. Perhaps. It's not as, what's

00:18:31.859 --> 00:18:34.339
the other word? Like, who are the bros gonna

00:18:34.339 --> 00:18:37.559
follow if they can't get themselves hyped up?

00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:40.000
You know what I mean? Like, you need to hype

00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.880
up, you need bros around. No, I guess you're

00:18:42.880 --> 00:18:45.400
right. And like, if they're not, if they're not

00:18:45.400 --> 00:18:49.819
honestly like the bros, I feel like if they didn't

00:18:49.819 --> 00:18:53.000
get enough of that hype in just their day -to

00:18:53.000 --> 00:18:55.920
-day life, they would end up in a cult or something.

00:18:56.099 --> 00:18:58.460
Yes. And you don't want that. No, you don't want

00:18:58.460 --> 00:19:00.220
a bro in a cult. You really don't want that.

00:19:00.400 --> 00:19:02.640
No, that would be weird. That would be weird.

00:19:03.099 --> 00:19:05.839
Also, you know, cults... Cults are kind of weird.

00:19:06.160 --> 00:19:08.960
Yeah, cults are fucking weird. Cults are weird.

00:19:09.079 --> 00:19:11.480
I haven't heard of any good cults lately, but...

00:19:11.480 --> 00:19:14.539
I mean... There were some really good cults,

00:19:14.720 --> 00:19:17.900
like, back in, like, the 70s had the fucking

00:19:17.900 --> 00:19:22.190
lock on cults. Yes, define good cults. I mean,

00:19:22.190 --> 00:19:24.109
like, doing crazy shit. Like, if you're in a

00:19:24.109 --> 00:19:26.269
cult and you're following somebody, you need

00:19:26.269 --> 00:19:29.509
to do some crazy shit. Like, you can't be, like,

00:19:29.650 --> 00:19:32.230
just, you know, at the airport asking for money

00:19:32.230 --> 00:19:35.079
kind of cult. Right. You gotta be doing some

00:19:35.079 --> 00:19:37.220
fucking crazy shit. You gotta do some fucking

00:19:37.220 --> 00:19:40.220
People's Temple, move to Guiana, and commit mass

00:19:40.220 --> 00:19:43.140
suicide shit. Yay! That's the end goal. Yeah,

00:19:43.140 --> 00:19:44.799
that's the end, right. That's the end goal. Yeah,

00:19:45.099 --> 00:19:47.039
you wait until the 80s for that one. Yeah, you

00:19:47.039 --> 00:19:49.599
need to like, you need to absolutely believe

00:19:49.599 --> 00:19:52.099
the leader. Uh -huh. And I think if you don't

00:19:52.099 --> 00:19:54.440
hype up bros enough, right? Yeah. What's gonna

00:19:54.440 --> 00:19:56.019
happen is they're not gonna believe in the alpha

00:19:56.019 --> 00:19:58.339
guys anymore. Right. They're gonna follow the

00:19:58.339 --> 00:20:01.000
guy. And the guy that's been huffing the black,

00:20:01.160 --> 00:20:04.400
the black... the black pins the whole time. But

00:20:04.400 --> 00:20:07.160
lo and behold, guess what he's done? He started

00:20:07.160 --> 00:20:09.579
a fucking cult. He started a fucking cult. And

00:20:09.579 --> 00:20:12.579
it's got hot women in his cult. That's right.

00:20:12.700 --> 00:20:15.099
Which is really the, I think, the ultimate point

00:20:15.099 --> 00:20:19.799
of most cults. Yes. Free love, hot women. I was

00:20:19.799 --> 00:20:24.500
going to say just pounding meat, but yeah. Okay.

00:20:24.700 --> 00:20:27.220
Free love, whatever dude. But that guy started

00:20:27.220 --> 00:20:29.140
a cult and now all of a sudden you're a lost

00:20:29.140 --> 00:20:32.720
bro and that guy's... That guy that was the weirdo

00:20:32.720 --> 00:20:35.859
huffing black paint, huffing black ink markers.

00:20:36.140 --> 00:20:38.720
He don't look so weird anymore and he's actually

00:20:38.720 --> 00:20:43.259
made it to where the black ink, the black pens

00:20:43.259 --> 00:20:46.119
are part of his cult. They're part of the cult.

00:20:46.279 --> 00:20:48.440
They're part of the cult. Every one of them has

00:20:48.440 --> 00:20:50.680
a smudge under their nose like a Hitler mustache.

00:20:50.880 --> 00:20:55.420
Yes. Yes. Yeah. And if you're a lost bro. And

00:20:55.420 --> 00:20:59.509
like most great cults. It does eventually get

00:20:59.509 --> 00:21:02.309
racist at some point. It does. Or they all do

00:21:02.309 --> 00:21:05.089
a mass suicide. Or they do a mass one or the

00:21:05.089 --> 00:21:08.970
other. And escaping's fucking hard. See, that's

00:21:08.970 --> 00:21:10.710
the other thing I never understood about cults.

00:21:10.769 --> 00:21:14.049
It's like, why is fucking escaping so hard? Like,

00:21:14.490 --> 00:21:16.630
I don't want to be here anymore. Therefore, when

00:21:16.630 --> 00:21:18.690
all these people go to their fucking little gathering

00:21:18.690 --> 00:21:21.650
for their fucking seance or whatever, I'm just

00:21:21.650 --> 00:21:24.369
gonna bolt. Yeah, they're gonna find you. Why

00:21:24.369 --> 00:21:27.349
though? What do you mean why? Why? Because they

00:21:27.349 --> 00:21:29.210
don't want to let you go. You are, you are theirs.

00:21:29.710 --> 00:21:31.309
And you're like, dude, I'm just, you know, this

00:21:31.309 --> 00:21:33.509
was cool for a couple of months. Also, here's

00:21:33.509 --> 00:21:35.609
the other thing. If you've been in the cult for

00:21:35.609 --> 00:21:38.369
a while, you know shit that they don't want getting

00:21:38.369 --> 00:21:40.829
out. Right. But you can just be like, dude, look

00:21:40.829 --> 00:21:43.009
it. Look it? I won't tell them? I don't want

00:21:43.009 --> 00:21:45.490
to tell anybody. I'm just done. I don't want

00:21:45.490 --> 00:21:47.809
to be in your stupid cult anymore. Yeah. I mean,

00:21:47.910 --> 00:21:50.869
maybe. And also they they certainly have some

00:21:50.869 --> 00:21:54.069
shit on you Yeah, like like any good cult has

00:21:54.069 --> 00:21:57.009
has gotten you to fucking like confess confess

00:21:57.009 --> 00:21:59.170
to all your deepest darker secrets And they have

00:21:59.170 --> 00:22:01.789
something on and they've got it recorded and

00:22:01.789 --> 00:22:03.769
they've even got you confessing to shit You never

00:22:03.769 --> 00:22:05.990
even did and they've got that recorded. Yeah.

00:22:06.130 --> 00:22:09.569
Yeah, and I got shit on your family Yeah, there's

00:22:09.569 --> 00:22:12.109
no good that could see why yeah, I'm like even

00:22:12.109 --> 00:22:14.529
if you were only there for like the the orientation

00:22:14.529 --> 00:22:17.190
or whatever Because they have that orientation

00:22:17.190 --> 00:22:19.390
where like, you know, like you're visiting college.

00:22:19.549 --> 00:22:21.990
Yeah, it's kind of like you're visiting a cult,

00:22:21.990 --> 00:22:24.549
I assume. Yeah. And you're like a bro and you're

00:22:24.549 --> 00:22:26.789
kind of lost and you're kind of like, whoa, dude,

00:22:26.930 --> 00:22:29.730
I don't know. This ain't, this ain't bro enough

00:22:29.730 --> 00:22:32.089
for me. I think they really figure out that first

00:22:32.089 --> 00:22:33.609
week whether or not they're going to be able

00:22:33.609 --> 00:22:36.329
to get their fucking claws into you. Yeah. And

00:22:36.329 --> 00:22:38.210
if they aren't, they'll let you walk after that

00:22:38.210 --> 00:22:39.809
first week. And they haven't shown you any of

00:22:39.809 --> 00:22:42.869
the fucking... Any of the fucking... Any of the

00:22:42.869 --> 00:22:46.009
weird shit, right? The orgies. Yeah. None of

00:22:46.009 --> 00:22:49.230
that. The chicken sacrifices. Yeah. Like, they...

00:22:49.230 --> 00:22:52.690
You don't get any dirt on them until they already

00:22:52.690 --> 00:22:56.710
know fucking all of your dirt. And you're in.

00:22:56.789 --> 00:22:59.049
And you're in. You've already probably killed

00:22:59.049 --> 00:23:02.750
somebody at this point. Exactly. They've certainly

00:23:02.750 --> 00:23:04.789
got you committing crimes for them and shit like

00:23:04.789 --> 00:23:07.430
that. Yeah, of course. So we don't want bros

00:23:07.430 --> 00:23:09.650
to get lost like that. We don't want bros to

00:23:09.650 --> 00:23:12.150
get... So just find a bro who's looking down

00:23:12.150 --> 00:23:14.650
and before he goes and joins a cult... So you

00:23:14.650 --> 00:23:17.009
gotta hype him up. Yeah. Hey, there he is. You

00:23:17.009 --> 00:23:20.670
gotta give him a big dog. You just gotta hype

00:23:20.670 --> 00:23:23.809
up the bros because, you know, I also feel like

00:23:23.809 --> 00:23:25.910
if you don't hype up the bros and they go to

00:23:25.910 --> 00:23:28.920
cults or whatever, next thing you know... We're

00:23:28.920 --> 00:23:31.200
a bro this world and all we're doing is listen

00:23:31.200 --> 00:23:33.819
to these idiot fucking guys on the internet talking

00:23:33.819 --> 00:23:36.960
about alpha alpha stuff Yeah, also you don't

00:23:36.960 --> 00:23:39.759
want a bunch of guys in cults who also like fucking

00:23:39.759 --> 00:23:42.039
lift weights and go to the gym and shit Yeah,

00:23:42.240 --> 00:23:45.900
because you want to You just don't want to give

00:23:45.900 --> 00:23:48.779
them that much physical power. They will abuse

00:23:48.779 --> 00:23:50.980
it Oh, yeah, because most of the time people

00:23:50.980 --> 00:23:54.680
are people in Colts are pretty lost. Yeah They're

00:23:54.680 --> 00:23:57.930
pretty lost. Oh, yeah and bros The bros can snap

00:23:57.930 --> 00:24:00.269
out of it. They have that broness about them

00:24:00.269 --> 00:24:02.809
where they can just kind of be like, dude, this

00:24:02.809 --> 00:24:07.210
is kind of bogus. This is bogus. I don't want

00:24:07.210 --> 00:24:11.849
to eat no fucking raw chicken. Nah. Where's my

00:24:11.849 --> 00:24:14.950
pre -workout, dude? They fucking made me the

00:24:14.950 --> 00:24:19.210
getaway driver on a bank robbery. Now I'm in,

00:24:19.210 --> 00:24:22.519
now I'm in, now I'm in trouble. They filmed the

00:24:22.519 --> 00:24:24.539
whole thing and they made sure I was the only

00:24:24.539 --> 00:24:27.400
one not wearing a mask. And they called me Johnny

00:24:27.400 --> 00:24:31.859
Utah. They called me Johnny Utah. That's my cult

00:24:31.859 --> 00:24:36.059
name now, Johnny Utah. All right, so yeah, save

00:24:36.059 --> 00:24:38.799
the bros. Hype up your bro. If you see a bro,

00:24:39.019 --> 00:24:41.779
hype him up. Hype him up. Don't let him be, don't

00:24:41.779 --> 00:24:44.440
let him get fucking blast that creed for him.

00:24:45.019 --> 00:24:47.230
Yeah. Get him, get him, we don't need him joining

00:24:47.230 --> 00:24:50.049
Colts. Yeah. And stay away from the guy that

00:24:50.049 --> 00:24:52.829
fucking huffs black pins. Well, you don't have

00:24:52.829 --> 00:24:55.150
to stay away from him, but, you know, don't,

00:24:55.150 --> 00:24:59.349
don't, maybe, maybe, like, keep, keep, keep,

00:24:59.349 --> 00:25:01.190
keep an eye on that. Yeah, that guy's gotta become

00:25:01.190 --> 00:25:04.549
a cult leader or a fucking slasher. Yeah. Or,

00:25:04.549 --> 00:25:07.589
or he'll find his purpose in life and... Maybe

00:25:07.589 --> 00:25:10.710
turn out to be a multimillionaire. Yeah, or just

00:25:10.710 --> 00:25:13.089
a regular dude. He fucking works his nine to

00:25:13.089 --> 00:25:16.519
five and... comes home to the wife and says,

00:25:16.539 --> 00:25:18.759
Oh, hey, honey, I'm gonna go in my room and have

00:25:18.759 --> 00:25:23.019
some black pins, but you know, in the meantime,

00:25:23.019 --> 00:25:25.220
you know, I'll help the kids with the homework.

00:25:26.039 --> 00:25:28.119
But that actually the kids are teaching me how

00:25:28.119 --> 00:25:30.700
to do this new math. I have no idea. It's fucking

00:25:30.700 --> 00:25:34.740
bizarre to me. I don't get it. Yeah. So help

00:25:34.740 --> 00:25:37.240
out the bros, stay away from the guy with the

00:25:37.240 --> 00:25:38.680
black pin. There was something else I wanted

00:25:38.680 --> 00:25:41.400
to talk about today too. And I'm trying to think.

00:25:42.129 --> 00:25:43.869
Already talked about the change thing. Yeah,

00:25:43.869 --> 00:25:45.609
there was something I want to talk about. What's

00:25:45.609 --> 00:25:48.329
that? Oh, I can't remember because I'm I'm kind

00:25:48.329 --> 00:25:51.829
of like moment I remember it was the bros. It

00:25:51.829 --> 00:25:58.430
was the change thing and We already did the play

00:25:58.430 --> 00:26:00.190
-by -play in your dog, you're I guess your dog's

00:26:00.190 --> 00:26:02.930
done with the she's just taking a nap on the

00:26:02.930 --> 00:26:07.130
couch now. Yeah, she's exhausted She was really

00:26:07.130 --> 00:26:11.089
She's like I was banging. Yeah, she was I'm tired

00:26:11.279 --> 00:26:15.039
She will fuck that thing across the room and

00:26:15.039 --> 00:26:17.819
then all the way across again. Did she do it

00:26:17.819 --> 00:26:19.460
like when people are over, like you're having

00:26:19.460 --> 00:26:21.339
a gathering or something and people are like,

00:26:21.339 --> 00:26:23.200
all of a sudden they looked at it and there's

00:26:23.200 --> 00:26:26.400
your dog up in this fucking stuffed right? He's

00:26:26.400 --> 00:26:29.339
actually more likely to do it when people are

00:26:29.339 --> 00:26:32.099
over, and I think it's because she wants to show

00:26:32.099 --> 00:26:35.859
them like, hey, I'm a top. She wants to show

00:26:35.859 --> 00:26:39.259
the people who are over. I think that's what

00:26:39.259 --> 00:26:43.019
her deal is. Yeah. There is another thing I wanted

00:26:43.019 --> 00:26:46.460
to talk about. The text messages. Oh yeah, that's

00:26:46.460 --> 00:26:49.140
it. All right. The group text messages. Did you

00:26:49.140 --> 00:26:52.539
hear about that? What, the fucking, the fucking,

00:26:52.539 --> 00:26:55.880
the fucking Huthy attack plan stuff? Yeah. Yeah,

00:26:55.880 --> 00:26:58.500
that was a bit of a fuck up, huh? Yeah. Yeah.

00:26:58.500 --> 00:27:00.400
Could you imagine, like, you're planning a party

00:27:00.400 --> 00:27:02.019
for, like, your girlfriend, you're planning a

00:27:02.019 --> 00:27:03.579
party or something like that, and all of a sudden

00:27:03.579 --> 00:27:06.079
somebody's like, oh yeah, by the way, these F

00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:09.039
-18 fighters that we have, you're like, how the

00:27:09.039 --> 00:27:11.640
fuck did this happen? How did I get this chat?

00:27:12.619 --> 00:27:19.400
I mean, yeah, it would be like if you and me

00:27:19.400 --> 00:27:23.180
and some other guy were texting some important

00:27:23.180 --> 00:27:27.059
shit about baking a cake. Right. But we also

00:27:27.059 --> 00:27:35.640
just randomly texted some asshole who fucking

00:27:35.640 --> 00:27:38.559
lives down the street and who we've never spoken

00:27:38.559 --> 00:27:41.950
to before. Right. Right? That would be pretty

00:27:41.950 --> 00:27:45.009
preposterous. Yeah. Yeah. Can you, and you're

00:27:45.009 --> 00:27:46.650
like planning this cake and you're like, dude,

00:27:46.670 --> 00:27:48.190
it should be like this. It should be like that.

00:27:48.250 --> 00:27:49.950
It should have icing in the middle of it. It

00:27:49.950 --> 00:27:53.009
should have icing on top. But listen, got the,

00:27:53.009 --> 00:27:56.589
the fucking, fucking the, the cake is taking

00:27:56.589 --> 00:28:01.930
off at 1800 hours. All right. The first, the

00:28:01.930 --> 00:28:05.470
first frosting is definitely going onto the cake

00:28:05.470 --> 00:28:10.089
at 1927. some frosting might be going on before

00:28:10.089 --> 00:28:12.369
that. And then this random dude that you don't

00:28:12.369 --> 00:28:15.650
like, all of a sudden goes, you know, I work

00:28:15.650 --> 00:28:19.809
for a newspaper. He doesn't even do that. He's

00:28:19.809 --> 00:28:22.289
just, he's just, he's just like, okay, I'm at,

00:28:23.130 --> 00:28:25.509
he, cause this dude, he didn't say shit. He was

00:28:25.509 --> 00:28:28.190
just, he was just, after getting all these messages,

00:28:28.230 --> 00:28:29.890
he was like, I probably shouldn't be getting

00:28:29.890 --> 00:28:32.829
this shit. So he just fucking logged off. Yeah.

00:28:32.990 --> 00:28:34.890
And then wrote, and then he's gonna write an

00:28:34.890 --> 00:28:36.710
article about it. And then he writes an article

00:28:36.710 --> 00:28:39.509
about, you weren't supposed to be there to write

00:28:39.509 --> 00:28:42.430
an art. Well, if it was about my cake, I'd be

00:28:42.430 --> 00:28:46.069
pissed. And he pissed, too! That said, I feel

00:28:46.069 --> 00:28:48.990
like our national security people maybe should

00:28:48.990 --> 00:28:52.009
be a little less cavalier with, like, when the

00:28:52.009 --> 00:28:54.250
fighters are taking off. Yeah, or when they're

00:28:54.250 --> 00:28:58.210
baking a cake. Mm -hmm. Because at least to,

00:28:58.210 --> 00:29:00.130
like, you know... Cause then you're talking about

00:29:00.130 --> 00:29:01.630
cakes like that. And then all of a sudden you're

00:29:01.630 --> 00:29:02.930
talking, you're talking, you're like, Hey, what

00:29:02.930 --> 00:29:04.650
if we make this cake? And all of a sudden you're

00:29:04.650 --> 00:29:06.750
like, Hey, what if we have somebody come over

00:29:06.750 --> 00:29:09.009
and do a little cake farting on that cake? A

00:29:09.009 --> 00:29:11.250
little cake farting on it. Just blow it up. What,

00:29:11.250 --> 00:29:13.730
what if the guy down the street who we included

00:29:13.730 --> 00:29:17.029
in our fucking text chain had called a cake farter

00:29:17.029 --> 00:29:20.250
just right then and there to show up and fart

00:29:20.250 --> 00:29:23.329
on the cake, like bear cake before any frosting

00:29:23.329 --> 00:29:25.390
got on? Right. He just blew up the cake. Just

00:29:25.390 --> 00:29:28.109
blew up the cake with this fart. before we could

00:29:28.109 --> 00:29:30.670
even get our frosting on the cake. That would

00:29:30.670 --> 00:29:32.230
ruin the whole cake. It would ruin the whole

00:29:32.230 --> 00:29:34.390
cake. It would ruin the whole cake. Yeah. Yeah.

00:29:34.950 --> 00:29:37.410
And, you know, they just giggle and run out the

00:29:37.410 --> 00:29:40.069
door. As a cake farter does. As a cake farter

00:29:40.069 --> 00:29:43.369
does. Stupid cake farters. Fucking cake farters

00:29:43.369 --> 00:29:46.130
ruining cakes. They just walk around all randomly.

00:29:47.009 --> 00:29:49.289
Oh, here's a good cake. Oh, look at me. I'm gonna

00:29:49.289 --> 00:29:51.109
take off my pants. I'm gonna sit on your cake

00:29:51.109 --> 00:29:53.730
and just fart on it. Because I'm a cake farter.

00:29:55.360 --> 00:29:57.259
That's not as big as it used to be. That's the

00:29:57.259 --> 00:29:58.740
other thing I was thinking about. You know what?

00:29:59.180 --> 00:30:00.839
That was the other thing I was thinking about.

00:30:01.359 --> 00:30:04.279
Things that were big during the pandemic, that

00:30:04.279 --> 00:30:06.299
aren't like, people don't give a shit about it.

00:30:06.299 --> 00:30:08.940
You know, a lot of things sort of like come and

00:30:08.940 --> 00:30:13.259
go. Yeah. But some things have like, they got

00:30:13.259 --> 00:30:15.180
legs, they last, they stick around. Yeah, but

00:30:15.180 --> 00:30:17.859
I don't think cake farting. Cake farting, I don't

00:30:17.859 --> 00:30:20.650
think was one of them. No. But... Then again,

00:30:20.710 --> 00:30:22.789
I'm not, like, in the cake farting scene, so

00:30:22.789 --> 00:30:25.549
I don't know how active they are. Yeah. What

00:30:25.549 --> 00:30:27.369
about furries? You think furries are still around?

00:30:27.410 --> 00:30:28.990
I think furries are still a thing. They're just

00:30:28.990 --> 00:30:31.630
more down the demo. They're still a thing, but...

00:30:31.630 --> 00:30:34.549
Well, I mean, furries are now, like, out in the

00:30:34.549 --> 00:30:37.109
fucking universe. You'll see a guy just walking

00:30:37.109 --> 00:30:40.029
around town with ears or a tail, but it's not

00:30:40.029 --> 00:30:42.630
a sex thing. Yeah, I know. It's a weird thing.

00:30:43.829 --> 00:30:45.789
That guy's huffed too many black ink markers.

00:30:45.990 --> 00:30:50.289
Very maybe. Or he's a little autistic. Probably

00:30:50.289 --> 00:30:54.730
that. But no, I was thinking because like I remember

00:30:54.730 --> 00:30:57.150
there was all these like fancy ass computerized

00:30:57.150 --> 00:30:58.630
gyms that you could have at your house and you

00:30:58.630 --> 00:31:01.349
just fucking put up on a wall. Yeah. And they're

00:31:01.349 --> 00:31:03.369
like, oh, it's incredible. It's like 300 pounds

00:31:03.369 --> 00:31:05.390
of weight and you could do all these exercises

00:31:05.390 --> 00:31:08.349
on it. There's all that. And like all those companies

00:31:08.349 --> 00:31:10.410
now, four years later, five years later or whatever.

00:31:11.730 --> 00:31:13.799
Most of them are gone. And you can buy that shit

00:31:13.799 --> 00:31:16.420
on Facebook Marketplace for like 200 bucks. Yeah.

00:31:16.599 --> 00:31:18.099
Well, it turns out most people, if they're going

00:31:18.099 --> 00:31:19.819
to go to the gym, would rather go to the gym.

00:31:19.819 --> 00:31:22.759
Yeah. Than sacrifice a room of their house to

00:31:22.759 --> 00:31:25.220
be an at -home gym that they'll never use. Yeah.

00:31:25.700 --> 00:31:27.799
I know some people that are like, they really

00:31:27.799 --> 00:31:29.559
like fucking working out at home. And I'm just

00:31:29.559 --> 00:31:33.240
like, I tried it and it's not me. Yeah. But if

00:31:33.240 --> 00:31:37.400
I had like a separate garage. where I can just

00:31:37.400 --> 00:31:39.440
build up this fucking wonderful gym of my own.

00:31:39.799 --> 00:31:42.259
I can see that, but if I just have a fucking

00:31:42.259 --> 00:31:45.240
thing against a wall, a little fucking cheap

00:31:45.240 --> 00:31:48.279
-ass fucking treadmill, like I have a little

00:31:48.279 --> 00:31:50.779
treadmill walker at home, and I still go to the

00:31:50.779 --> 00:31:52.960
fucking gym to walk on the treadmill. Yeah, there

00:31:52.960 --> 00:31:55.819
you go. You could buy a used Bowflex. Yeah. I

00:31:55.819 --> 00:31:57.700
had a roommate that had a bow flex, and it just

00:31:57.700 --> 00:31:59.480
sat in her fucking backyard, and I was like,

00:31:59.859 --> 00:32:02.740
dude. Dude, he took up like half of the deck

00:32:02.740 --> 00:32:04.859
in the backyard, and I was just like, dude, and

00:32:04.859 --> 00:32:06.519
he used it once. The whole time he lived with

00:32:06.519 --> 00:32:09.180
us, he used it once. And he was just like, oh,

00:32:09.220 --> 00:32:12.140
I got to replace one of the pins on it. Like,

00:32:12.259 --> 00:32:13.740
do those things break down a lot? He's like,

00:32:13.900 --> 00:32:16.720
yeah. Like, he's like, I bought this thing pretty

00:32:16.720 --> 00:32:19.619
cheap on Facebook marketplace. That's where you

00:32:19.619 --> 00:32:22.160
go for everything that was cool at one point,

00:32:22.539 --> 00:32:24.839
and you want to get it hella cheap now? Facebook

00:32:24.839 --> 00:32:26.579
Marketplace. Hell yeah. That should be their

00:32:26.579 --> 00:32:29.960
slogan. That should be theirs. Get shit that

00:32:29.960 --> 00:32:33.900
was cool three years ago for hella cheap on Facebook

00:32:33.900 --> 00:32:38.200
Marketplace. For under the price that this guy

00:32:38.200 --> 00:32:41.700
bought it for, and he only used it once. Dude,

00:32:41.700 --> 00:32:43.519
I've seen some shit on Facebook Marketplace where

00:32:43.519 --> 00:32:44.880
they're like, yeah, it's still in the box. I

00:32:44.880 --> 00:32:47.140
fucking bought it. I didn't like it. I bought

00:32:47.140 --> 00:32:50.140
another one. So I'm selling this one. Like whatever

00:32:50.140 --> 00:32:53.640
it is, like TV, fucking... Get a slightly used

00:32:53.640 --> 00:32:58.480
Peloton for $150. I've never seen Pelotons that

00:32:58.480 --> 00:33:00.539
cheap, although I heard that Pelotons aren't

00:33:00.539 --> 00:33:03.819
as big as they used to be either. But, and you

00:33:03.819 --> 00:33:05.339
could probably buy one. I mean, they were selling

00:33:05.339 --> 00:33:07.480
those things for like fucking two grand at one

00:33:07.480 --> 00:33:09.599
point. I had a friend who had a Peloton. This

00:33:09.599 --> 00:33:13.779
was, oh God, this was like seven or eight years

00:33:13.779 --> 00:33:18.519
ago. And I used it one time and it was okay,

00:33:19.019 --> 00:33:22.500
but... But I never got on it to get there. I

00:33:22.500 --> 00:33:25.160
had an open invitation to use it whenever Yeah,

00:33:25.160 --> 00:33:27.779
I never got it. I never got it's the one thing

00:33:27.779 --> 00:33:30.740
I've never got Like walking on a treadmill I

00:33:30.740 --> 00:33:32.200
get because it's nice and easy and you can set

00:33:32.200 --> 00:33:34.319
the incline how you like it. I guess not that

00:33:34.319 --> 00:33:37.279
I don't got a fucking run Yeah, I understand.

00:33:37.279 --> 00:33:39.920
I actually now I understand why people run because

00:33:39.920 --> 00:33:42.259
they like the fucking runner high Yeah, right.

00:33:42.400 --> 00:33:46.339
I get that they get that natch. Yeah. Yeah Even

00:33:46.339 --> 00:33:48.700
though I don't necessarily like running. I don't

00:33:48.700 --> 00:33:51.730
like running at all I always pull some fucking

00:33:51.730 --> 00:33:55.509
leg muscle when I run. It's weird. Anyway, the

00:33:55.509 --> 00:33:58.130
one thing I don't like, I don't understand to

00:33:58.130 --> 00:34:01.970
this day, bike riding. I've always been good

00:34:01.970 --> 00:34:04.430
on a bicycle. I've been good on a bike. I used

00:34:04.430 --> 00:34:07.369
to race BMX bikes. Like I know how to ride a

00:34:07.369 --> 00:34:09.570
bike. I've never understood, I'm going to get

00:34:09.570 --> 00:34:12.650
on a 10 speed and I'm going to ride 60 fucking

00:34:12.650 --> 00:34:16.070
miles on the fucking, on the left side of the

00:34:16.070 --> 00:34:19.460
road where there's no bike lane. in my fucking

00:34:19.460 --> 00:34:23.500
biker gear for 60 miles. Yeah, yeah, you definitely

00:34:23.500 --> 00:34:25.480
want to at least go on the right side of the

00:34:25.480 --> 00:34:27.460
road. See, that's what I don't understand, man.

00:34:27.820 --> 00:34:31.880
It's like... Yeah, I don't fully get, like, street

00:34:31.880 --> 00:34:34.219
biking. I used to be a big mountain biker. Yeah,

00:34:34.280 --> 00:34:35.940
mountain biking I get, because you go off jumps

00:34:35.940 --> 00:34:40.079
and shit. That's cool. Well, even the fucking

00:34:40.079 --> 00:34:43.099
strenuous uphill part, it's like a challenge

00:34:43.099 --> 00:34:46.380
to go up crazy terrain, like, charging up a mountain.

00:34:46.380 --> 00:34:49.019
But see, I get all that. I get all that. It's

00:34:49.019 --> 00:34:51.260
the dirt. It's fucking outside. You're on our

00:34:51.260 --> 00:34:55.360
fucking road for 60 miles in a fucking bright

00:34:55.360 --> 00:34:58.219
-ass fucking suit. Yeah. Cuz that's all they

00:34:58.219 --> 00:35:00.780
usually are is like some bright -ass fucking

00:35:00.780 --> 00:35:04.019
yellow suit. Yeah, it's it's fucking it's lycra.

00:35:04.059 --> 00:35:07.300
It breathes really well It hugs the flesh so

00:35:07.300 --> 00:35:09.920
that you don't like chafe shit and it has a padded

00:35:09.920 --> 00:35:13.039
ass Well padded ass would be your pattern, right?

00:35:13.119 --> 00:35:15.760
If you're riding if you're riding 60 miles a

00:35:15.760 --> 00:35:18.059
padded ass would be various Especially if you

00:35:18.059 --> 00:35:19.840
got one of those high -performance bike seats

00:35:19.840 --> 00:35:22.639
because those things will fucking dig into your

00:35:22.639 --> 00:35:26.630
ass That they will just sleep. Yeah. Oh god But

00:35:26.630 --> 00:35:30.250
yeah, that was the thing. I was talking to a

00:35:30.250 --> 00:35:31.789
guy, I was talking to a friend of mine about

00:35:31.789 --> 00:35:33.489
it the other week, because he was like, yeah,

00:35:33.530 --> 00:35:36.750
I just started getting into biking. And I'm like,

00:35:36.769 --> 00:35:38.969
oh yeah, you mountain biking? No, I'm road biking.

00:35:39.730 --> 00:35:41.489
And he's talking about these crazy rides he goes

00:35:41.489 --> 00:35:44.630
on. And I'm just like, I don't get it. Why do

00:35:44.630 --> 00:35:47.190
you want to go fucking right after the fucking

00:35:47.190 --> 00:35:49.389
30 miles? That means, like, I get it. If you

00:35:49.389 --> 00:35:52.789
ride 30 miles or 60 miles or whatever, have another

00:35:52.789 --> 00:35:55.139
fucking car there waiting for you. So you don't

00:35:55.139 --> 00:35:56.719
have to, because then you got to ride 60 miles

00:35:56.719 --> 00:35:59.900
back, dude. Yeah. Like who wants to, that's 120

00:35:59.900 --> 00:36:03.559
miles altogether. You can do Matt. Yeah. All

00:36:03.559 --> 00:36:07.159
in my head. All in your head. By myself. Yeah.

00:36:07.519 --> 00:36:10.500
Yeah. I don't, I'm not much of a road cyclist.

00:36:10.559 --> 00:36:12.739
Yeah. I don't get it. Yeah. But I think at that

00:36:12.739 --> 00:36:14.579
point, because now we're just reaching for straws.

00:36:14.659 --> 00:36:16.300
I think at that point, at this point we need

00:36:16.300 --> 00:36:18.360
to fucking end the episode. Yeah. I like it.

00:36:18.360 --> 00:36:21.360
I'm on board. Cause you know. Again, if you know

00:36:21.360 --> 00:36:23.119
a bro that's kind of feeling down, you know,

00:36:23.219 --> 00:36:25.780
we gave you some sayings. Say to him, blast some

00:36:25.780 --> 00:36:28.599
cream, give him some pre -workout. Give him a,

00:36:29.000 --> 00:36:34.639
big dog. Big dog. Or, there he is. My man. My

00:36:34.639 --> 00:36:39.179
man. That one works too. My man. Or, what was

00:36:39.179 --> 00:36:42.760
the other one? Hey chief. Yeah, hey chief. Hey

00:36:42.760 --> 00:36:45.300
chief works. You know, cheer your bro up, because

00:36:45.300 --> 00:36:47.300
you don't want him joining the cult. That's right.

00:36:47.519 --> 00:36:51.159
because that would be bad. Bros and colts? No.

00:36:51.360 --> 00:36:54.500
Nah. Anyway, thank you for listening. If you

00:36:54.500 --> 00:36:56.679
listened all the way through, you could go to

00:36:56.679 --> 00:36:59.940
our website, shaneandishow .com. If you want

00:36:59.940 --> 00:37:02.159
episodes delivered right to your inbox, sign

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up there. They come right to your inbox right

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when we release them. Also, there's a little

00:37:07.539 --> 00:37:09.480
donation thing if you want to donate two bucks

00:37:09.480 --> 00:37:15.199
or whatever. Do it. Give us a topic. Tell us

00:37:15.199 --> 00:37:17.869
what you want us to talk about. We'll talk about

00:37:17.869 --> 00:37:20.469
it interact with us. Leave us a review somewhere

00:37:20.469 --> 00:37:23.690
if you pay me. I'll say anything again Yeah,

00:37:23.769 --> 00:37:27.429
hey big big brands, you know If you pay us we

00:37:27.429 --> 00:37:29.670
will fucking talk the shit out of your brand

00:37:29.670 --> 00:37:31.989
the whole episode the whole episode the whole

00:37:31.989 --> 00:37:35.329
episode these adidas I can't get enough. I can't

00:37:35.329 --> 00:37:38.309
get enough. Yeah, they're better than Nike. They're

00:37:38.309 --> 00:37:43.210
better than Nike Anyway until next time America.

00:37:43.469 --> 00:38:13.210
Yep. Don't be a dick. Don't be a dick free audio

00:38:13.210 --> 00:38:17.050
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