SHAYNE AND I SHOW ANNUAL CHRISTMAS EPISODE

WEBVTT

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Hey, welcome back to the Shane and I show my

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name is Shane. My name is Max trees get tall

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Trees get tall. Yeah, they do get tall. Yeah

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here in California. Yeah Yeah, we have some of

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the tallest here in California as a matter of

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fact and some of the oldest yes old redwoods

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the the the oldest tree ever known to live Was

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here in California they cut it down and well

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what they did was they were taking a core sample

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out of it, right? And the coring tool got stuck.

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And those things, those things are fucking expensive.

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So they had to cut it down to get the tool out.

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And then they figure, well, fuck it. We, you

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know, we're here. We'll count. We'll count the

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rings. We've already done it. Yeah. So they,

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they, they cut it down and then they're counting

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the rings and they realized that they cut down

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the oldest living tree. Good for them. Way to

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go. Hey, this is the podcast about nothing that

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makes you think of something. I was just checking

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the date, and I figure that today is gonna be

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our annual Christmas episode. It's a good day

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for a Christmas episode. You know, because we've

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been a podcast for a long time. We've done a

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Christmas episode, I think, every year. Yeah.

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So it is an annual thing. It is. Christmas happens

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every year. Yeah. And we have an annual podcast

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episode that is a Christmas episode. That is

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true. And today's the goal is to try to not get

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dark. Yeah, I agree. I agree. We're gonna keep

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it light. Let's keep it light. And friendly.

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And friendly, fluffy, fucking happy. And jolly

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as fuck. Fucking jingle bells and all that shit.

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Rudolph and all that stuff. All that. So off

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the top of my head, here's what I got. Yeah.

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For Christmas. Yeah. Your top three favorite

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Christmas movies. Sure. Go. Oh, me? Yeah. Uh,

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fucking die hard. Right. Okay. You agree with

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me. Yeah. Yeah. A nightmare before Christmas.

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I don't agree with that one. Well, I like it,

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but like I was a kid when it came out, you know,

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and, uh, man, number three. Look, there's, there's

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a few that that can go in there. Right. But right

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now I'm just going to say elf. Elf is a good

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choice. Yeah. Elf is funny. It's a good choice.

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Okay. Mine. I can agree with you. With Die Hard.

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Yeah. Whether you want to debate it or not, Die

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Hard is a Christmas movie. Absolutely. It takes

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place during Christmas time. Yeah. There's Christmas

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decorations throughout the whole movie when they're

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blowing shit up. Yeah. They get ambushed at their

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Christmas party. Yes. Yeah. Yes. So all you people

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keep trying to say on the internet, on the interweb,

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that say Die Hard is not a Christmas movie, it

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is a Christmas movie. Yeah. It brings me joy

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to watch that guy get beat up by... By Hans and...

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Yeah, no, not that, no. I like watching Hans

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get beat up. Oh, you like watching Hans get beat

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up? Yeah. I like when he... By John McLean, that's

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it. By John McLean, yeah. I like when he... Yippee

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-ki -yay, motherfucking... When he falls. Yeah.

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And he's like, ooh! I like when he's like, oh,

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come out to L .A. Yeah. And when he's crawling

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in the thing, he's like, oh, come out to L .A.

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It'll be fun. Yeah. Then he falls. Yeah. At the

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start of the movie, he takes his shoes off, which

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proves to be a really bad move. But he didn't

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see that coming. So he takes his shoes off so

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he can, like, hug the carpet with his feet. And

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he's like, God damn, I bet we can't be spoiling

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this for you. You've had to see Die Hard. Die

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Hard's a 40 -year -old movie. If you haven't

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seen it, fuck you. That's on you, not us. It's

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on you. Okay, that's my number one is Die Hard.

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I have to agree with that one. All right. Number

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two, I'm going to go with something that a lot

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of people don't know about, but I think it's

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a great Christmas movie. Yeah. Nick Cage in The

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Family Man. Okay. Came out in early 2000. Probably

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one of my second favorite Nick Cage movies. Is

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that one of those where he wakes up and he's

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living a different life? Yeah, it's like a wonderful

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life, pretty much. It's pretty much a wonderful

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life, but set in modern times. But I like it

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because there's a sense of humor to it, you know

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what I mean? And he gets all Christmassy at the

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end of the movie. So my third one, it's a little

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overplayed at this point in time, at this point

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in life, I guess. A Christmas story. A Christmas

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story? Yeah. One with a little kid? Yeah. Uh,

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yeah, okay. Was it Sure Shot, Red Rider, Red

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Rifle, Red Rider Rifle? Yeah, I, you know - Shoot

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your eye out, kid. I saw that once ages ago,

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and it didn't really speak to me, but - I gotta

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run her up, too. Yeah? I got a fourth one. Alright.

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I just gotta throw a loop into this whole thing.

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Alright. Just because to me, it's a Christmas

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movie. Fuckin', let's hear it. First Blood. First

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Blood. That's a Christmas movie? Well, no. I

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watch it around Christmas time every year. And

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it's a good movie. It's a good movie. Yeah. The

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first Rambo. Yeah. I go Die Hard, First Blood.

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Those are like my two action movies for like

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December. Yeah. So to me, it doesn't take place

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in Christmas, I know. But to me. I mean, there's

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trees. There's trees. It's cold. Yeah. Because

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it's in Washington, I guess. Washington or Canada

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one of the two no, it's it's like it's it's in

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the states and it's Washington. It's somewhere

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in the northwest Yeah, yeah, Washington Portland

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some weird place like I got like I got like an

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Idaho feeling No, I remember I watched the thing

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on the behind the scenes of it. I'm talking about

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how they took it I think it's Washington State.

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All right, and just cuz it's shot in Washington

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doesn't mean it takes place in Washington, right?

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Like I thought it was like an Idaho or Montana

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kind of thing. Yeah, but Which are right next

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door. To me, it's a Christmas movie. So you can

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come at me in the comments or whatever about

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it. But to me, it's a Christmas movie. Those

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are my top three with the runner up. I gave you

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a bonus. All right. So watch Die Hard during

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Christmas time and you'll feel good about yourself.

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Yeah. If you watch Elf or Christmas story. I

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mean, a Christmas story plays 24 hours on Christmas

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day every year. So. Does it? Yeah. All right.

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On regular TV, like TBS or TV. I mean, yeah,

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that's on. Yeah. You can find it. They play it

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24 hours. I also really like the original, It's

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a Wonderful Life. All right. Like that I could

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go with too. I still watch that on occasion.

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Is that Jimmy Stewart? Yeah, Jimmy Stewart when

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he was trying to be a serious actor. Oh, wow.

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Yeah. Yeah, that was like his big thing when

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he did that movie. Everybody was like, oh my

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God, Jimmy Stewart's like a serious actor. Oh,

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it's a miracle. I can't really do a good Jimmy

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Stewart. It's hard to do a good Jimmy Stewart.

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I don't even know, I know maybe one person that

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does a spot on Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Stewart did

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plenty of serious roles. The rear window. But

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that was after he did It's a Wonderful Life.

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Like it's a wonderful life is a serious rule.

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Yeah, but that was like that was like his first

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series Yeah, I mean doesn't it start with him

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being like I'm gonna kill myself. Yeah. Yeah,

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I'm gonna throw myself off this I think he's

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trying he wants to jump off a bridge. Yeah Like

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it's pretty dark to start with. Yeah, and it's

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pretty dark all the way through Yeah, but we're

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not getting dark today But you got all those

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movies that are those Christmas movies that are

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like that like a Christmas Carol. That's fucking

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dark Yeah, it is. Yeah, a fucking shitty old

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man. Yeah. Haunted by the ghosts of men he killed.

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Yeah. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah, and it's like... There's

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only one, like, the third act of that movie is

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where it starts getting a little hopeful. Like,

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almost all the way through that movie, you're

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like, damn, dude, you really fucked up your life.

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Well, I mean, in the third act, he's there with,

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like, Ghosts of Christmas Future. Right. And

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it's like he's, like, looking at his tomb and

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nobody came to his funeral or some shit. I don't

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know. It was a dark movie. They redid it a couple

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of years ago with Patrick Stewart. It was pretty

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good. It was a pretty good version of it. I believe

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it. Is that the one with the Muppets? No. No.

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It's a serious one. In fact, I think I might

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watch that at some point this Christmas season.

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Me too. It's a classic. It's a classic. You got

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to go at least one Christmas season watching

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A Christmas Carol. Yeah. I want to give an honorable

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mention to Bad Santa. Bad Santa's hilarious.

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I was just watching that the other day actually.

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It's such a good movie. It's such a good movie.

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It's so funny. I don't think that's one of those

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movies that could get made today. No, probably

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not. But it's such a good movie. It's hilarious

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all the way through. Yeah, it's so good. I remember

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I saw that in the theater when he came out. Mm

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-hmm. With our good buddy Ron. Yeah. Yeah. I

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didn't see it with you guys, but I did see it

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when it came out in the theater. It was good.

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It was hilarious. Such a good movie, man. Who's

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the guy? Who's the other character? The other

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guy in there? Bernie Mac. Yeah, Bernie Mac's

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in there, Billy Bob, the little guy. Yeah, the

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kid. The kid makes that whole movie. Yeah, I

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think is, is, is Marissa Tomei the girl? I think

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so. Yeah. That kid makes the whole movie. The

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kid makes the movie. It's not really that good

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of a movie. Yeah. And he does amazing. Yeah.

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Playing a slow kid. Yeah. I made you a pickle.

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I made you a pickle. So great. But yeah, man.

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I could go with Bad Santa. You know what I didn't

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see though? I never saw Bad Santa 2. They made

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a Bad Santa 2 and I never saw it. I don't know

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if I did either. I think they made an Elf 2 too.

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No. They didn't? No. I could have swore they

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did. Maybe they did. Or they've been hyping up

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that they did. Maybe they did. Because I know

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they made, what was it, a Zoolander 2. Yep. Which

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wasn't any good. It was not terrible. It wasn't

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terrible. It just wasn't. Because that original

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Zoolander was incredible. You can't beat that.

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You know, here's the thing with a movie like

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Zoolander and why maybe a Zoolander 2 didn't

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land right. First off, like Zoolander was made

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in the early 2000s. Yeah, you get away with a

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lot more stuff. And Zoolander 2 came out in like

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2020. And just comedy was in a different place.

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But the second thing, when Zoolander came out,

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It was so different. Yeah. It was so unique.

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Well, you had a bunch of those movies that came

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out around that time that were like that. You

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had, like, Wedding Crashers. You had, like, Old

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School. Old School. Great. Yeah. Right. All those

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movies, like, you kind of can't do today. No.

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And by the time Zoolander 2 came out, it was

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like the whole movie had become a cliché that

00:11:20.009 --> 00:11:23.809
your dad talks about. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which

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is too bad. Yeah. So what else about Christmastime

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do we like? Oh, I like the food sometimes. The

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food, yeah. The food can be good. The sweets,

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yeah. I like the gingerbread cookies. Every year

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I get myself a candy cane and I just... Yeah,

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I'm not big on candy canes. I'm not huge on candy

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canes, but once a year I get like a proper full

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-size candy cane and I just go to town just slobbering

00:11:48.500 --> 00:11:51.620
all over that fucker for a day, man. Just slobbering.

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Yeah. You know what I'm big on during Christmastime

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and it's like the one time a year that I'm big

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on it. What is like parties parties like going

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to parties Yeah, like I think but it takes me

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so long. I realized this the other day I went

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to a Christmas party like last Thursday. Mm -hmm

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and like dude it took me like It took me a few

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hours to get in the mood to like go Like I was

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like, ah, I kind of don't want to go. I kind

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of got it. I got to figure out a way out of this.

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But like, I was like, nah, I'm going to go. I'm

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going to have fun. I'm going to like be festive

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and shit. Right. Yeah. Against my better judgment.

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I went right. And I actually had a fun, good

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time. It was a good time. I'm like, dude, two

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parties a year during Christmas time is not bad

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for a guy like me. Yeah, that's not. And Christmas

00:12:38.789 --> 00:12:41.279
parties are really chill. Yeah. Especially when

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you get to an age where you go to parties and

00:12:43.100 --> 00:12:47.000
you're not there just to get plastered. You're

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not there just to fucking drink cheap wine. Yeah.

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You're like, oh, I'm going to catch up with people.

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Yeah. Meet someone new and talk about the holidays.

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Fuck it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The holidays are a

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good time of year. You get to get presents for

00:13:01.240 --> 00:13:04.879
people sometimes. Sometimes. You said something

00:13:04.879 --> 00:13:06.940
to me because I hate the presents thing. Right.

00:13:07.200 --> 00:13:09.980
And you said something to me. Gift cards. No,

00:13:10.220 --> 00:13:12.220
you said something to me that like changed the

00:13:12.220 --> 00:13:16.059
way I view presence. And you said this very recently.

00:13:16.179 --> 00:13:18.600
Really? And it wasn't, you weren't saying it

00:13:18.600 --> 00:13:20.700
too, you were just kind of like mentioning it,

00:13:20.799 --> 00:13:23.039
like this was your motivation for getting a present

00:13:23.039 --> 00:13:25.580
for somebody. And you're like, you know, it's

00:13:25.580 --> 00:13:29.460
just about like, like, like, um, participating

00:13:29.460 --> 00:13:31.960
and yeah. I think I was talking about Thanksgiving.

00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:35.080
Yeah. Yeah, they cook it a turkey. Yeah, and

00:13:35.080 --> 00:13:37.720
I was like, holy shit, is that why people do

00:13:37.720 --> 00:13:40.860
Christmas presents? Yeah. And now I'm like, oh

00:13:40.860 --> 00:13:44.379
my God, I have to, ugh. I don't like it, but

00:13:44.379 --> 00:13:46.340
I understand it all of a sudden. Right, you know,

00:13:46.460 --> 00:13:48.220
for me, because for me, there was a long time

00:13:48.220 --> 00:13:51.059
where I was like, I'm not participating in Christmas.

00:13:51.399 --> 00:13:54.559
I boycott Christmas and all that. And I was miserable.

00:13:54.820 --> 00:13:57.129
Like I did not. It was like, what am I, what

00:13:57.129 --> 00:13:59.470
point am I trying to prove when I'm not buying

00:13:59.470 --> 00:14:02.409
presents for my family or whatever, right? Or

00:14:02.409 --> 00:14:07.629
people close to me, right? Like, I don't like

00:14:07.629 --> 00:14:11.990
the commercialism of Christmas or whatever. And

00:14:11.990 --> 00:14:14.549
I realize it's like, dude, it's not about me,

00:14:14.889 --> 00:14:17.809
right? Like it's really letting people down when

00:14:17.809 --> 00:14:19.870
you don't like get them a gift or something,

00:14:19.870 --> 00:14:21.889
or you don't even wish them a happy, Merry Christmas

00:14:21.889 --> 00:14:24.129
or happy holidays. Or I guess you can't say Merry

00:14:24.129 --> 00:14:27.350
Christmas these days. No, you can. I don't know.

00:14:27.409 --> 00:14:29.429
I saw an American Dad episode that says different.

00:14:29.889 --> 00:14:32.690
Yeah, that episode aired 20 years ago. I don't

00:14:32.690 --> 00:14:34.529
think so. I think it was just a few years ago.

00:14:35.190 --> 00:14:37.049
Really? Are they still making that show? Yeah.

00:14:37.470 --> 00:14:40.090
Fuck. Well, let me tell you something. 20 years

00:14:40.090 --> 00:14:42.570
ago, it would get a little dicey saying Merry

00:14:42.570 --> 00:14:46.330
Christmas to the wrong person. Right. Now, nobody

00:14:46.330 --> 00:14:49.769
gives a fuck anymore. You're allowed to say Merry

00:14:49.769 --> 00:14:54.279
Christmas again because... Freedom. because freedom,

00:14:54.740 --> 00:14:59.299
but more than that, because the people who used

00:14:59.299 --> 00:15:02.039
to get their panties in a wad about that have

00:15:02.039 --> 00:15:04.360
just moved on to other issues. Yeah, they got

00:15:04.360 --> 00:15:08.899
bigger fish to try to fry. They don't worry about

00:15:08.899 --> 00:15:12.620
Christmas. They don't worry about the bad Santa

00:15:12.620 --> 00:15:14.500
Claus coming to town song that Bruce Springsteen

00:15:14.500 --> 00:15:17.940
did. Yeah, those folks are now like the pronoun

00:15:17.940 --> 00:15:21.940
police and stuff. So, you know, they're on something

00:15:21.940 --> 00:15:24.669
different. And I haven't heard too many Christmas

00:15:24.669 --> 00:15:27.470
songs recently, which is kind of cool. Like,

00:15:27.509 --> 00:15:30.549
I know they're out there. I know if I walk into

00:15:30.549 --> 00:15:32.730
a grocery store, they're going to be there. But

00:15:32.730 --> 00:15:36.330
it hasn't bothered me like it has in the past.

00:15:36.429 --> 00:15:38.409
Yeah, there's a radio station around here that

00:15:38.409 --> 00:15:41.009
this time of year just exclusively plays Christmas

00:15:41.009 --> 00:15:44.789
music. I mean, there's like a radio station everywhere

00:15:44.789 --> 00:15:50.720
that does that. It's a weird thing when you change

00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:54.440
your perspective on something, and all of a sudden

00:15:54.440 --> 00:15:57.480
you're like, oh, it's actually kind of fun. It's

00:15:57.480 --> 00:16:00.519
not such a chore. No. Right? I still think it's

00:16:00.519 --> 00:16:02.899
a bit of a chore. Well, yeah. But that's me.

00:16:03.580 --> 00:16:05.460
I think a lot of the social part of it is a bit

00:16:05.460 --> 00:16:07.700
of a chore, but once I can get out of that...

00:16:07.740 --> 00:16:09.759
I still really hate the whole presents thing.

00:16:10.179 --> 00:16:13.399
It's a pain in my ass. And then everybody has

00:16:13.399 --> 00:16:16.200
just a bunch of shit that they don't want that

00:16:16.200 --> 00:16:19.000
they're gonna fucking give away. And hooray,

00:16:19.039 --> 00:16:21.340
we've all given our money to the corporations

00:16:21.340 --> 00:16:23.980
and filled up the landfills. Good for us, Pat,

00:16:23.980 --> 00:16:28.120
on the back. But, but, I know now that that's

00:16:28.120 --> 00:16:31.860
not what giving gifts is about. So, fine. The

00:16:31.860 --> 00:16:34.580
worst thing, there's things that I still don't

00:16:34.580 --> 00:16:40.490
like about Christmas. Yeah. like those fucking

00:16:40.490 --> 00:16:42.429
ones where you sit in the circle and everybody

00:16:42.429 --> 00:16:45.370
passes a gift and that one fucking guy gets the

00:16:45.370 --> 00:16:48.309
good gift. You know, where you exchange numbers.

00:16:48.490 --> 00:16:49.870
The white elephant's there? The white elephant

00:16:49.870 --> 00:16:52.210
and that one guy gets the good gift. Okay. And

00:16:52.210 --> 00:16:53.909
he doesn't participate in the white elephant.

00:16:53.950 --> 00:16:55.730
He can't get his gift because he's like, I'm

00:16:55.730 --> 00:16:59.750
done. I'm done. I ain't doing this no more. Well,

00:16:59.750 --> 00:17:02.629
fuck that guy. There's always a guy at a Christmas

00:17:02.629 --> 00:17:05.089
party that does that. He misses the point of

00:17:05.089 --> 00:17:09.029
the... of the fucking white elephant thing. And

00:17:09.029 --> 00:17:11.569
then you're stuck with something like fucking

00:17:11.569 --> 00:17:15.230
skin lotion. Yeah, well, nobody likes what they

00:17:15.230 --> 00:17:18.069
get at a white elephant thing. I get stuck with

00:17:18.069 --> 00:17:20.869
skin lotion one year. Half the fun is everybody

00:17:20.869 --> 00:17:22.690
gets stuck with a piece of shit they didn't want.

00:17:23.250 --> 00:17:26.710
But that's like the only time. And it wasn't

00:17:26.710 --> 00:17:30.430
even like men's skin lotion. It was like women's

00:17:30.430 --> 00:17:35.349
skin lotion. Of course. Of course. And then the

00:17:35.349 --> 00:17:37.089
guy, like, sure enough, the guy that got the

00:17:37.089 --> 00:17:39.690
good gifts, it was something cool. Like a gift

00:17:39.690 --> 00:17:42.769
certificate to like Amazon or some shit. That's

00:17:42.769 --> 00:17:46.289
good. That's usable. Yeah. I mean, it was only

00:17:46.289 --> 00:17:48.650
like 20 bucks or whatever, but that's still usable.

00:17:48.650 --> 00:17:50.710
I'm going to spend 20 bucks on Amazon. Right.

00:17:50.769 --> 00:17:53.289
Yeah. And it, but it was just like, Oh, you said

00:17:53.289 --> 00:17:57.170
I'm done. I got what I want. Yeah. Or there's

00:17:57.170 --> 00:17:59.990
the guy that tries to strategically do the. The

00:17:59.990 --> 00:18:02.269
white elephant gift exchange where he like watches

00:18:02.269 --> 00:18:04.930
the gift that he wants and where it's going And

00:18:04.930 --> 00:18:06.809
then he's like, okay, it's right there. And then

00:18:06.809 --> 00:18:08.769
he's he's like plotting on how to get that gift

00:18:08.769 --> 00:18:14.690
back Don't like it. I don't like it Yeah, that's

00:18:14.690 --> 00:18:16.589
not really about the gifts. That's that's about

00:18:16.589 --> 00:18:20.329
the it's just a fun little game people play Like

00:18:20.329 --> 00:18:22.529
I could get it if like if like you do a gift

00:18:22.529 --> 00:18:23.930
exchange with your friends and they're like,

00:18:24.009 --> 00:18:26.569
okay Nobody's spending more. There's always that

00:18:26.619 --> 00:18:28.680
you do a gift exchange with your friends or whatever,

00:18:28.759 --> 00:18:30.380
and they're like, okay, nobody spend more than

00:18:30.380 --> 00:18:33.200
20 bucks, right? Or 25 or whatever the limit

00:18:33.200 --> 00:18:35.259
is. There's always that motherfucker that goes

00:18:35.259 --> 00:18:40.140
off the top. Yeah. I'll fuck that guy. Oh, you

00:18:40.140 --> 00:18:42.440
know, I was thinking like 25 bucks would have

00:18:42.440 --> 00:18:46.460
been cool, but you know, this was 40. It's still

00:18:46.460 --> 00:18:49.170
big heel. There's an old episode of The Office

00:18:49.170 --> 00:18:51.990
with Steve Carell. Like, they did that, but Steve

00:18:51.990 --> 00:18:53.730
Carell's like, but I want to be the guy who gives

00:18:53.730 --> 00:18:56.369
a good gift so he gets an iPod or something.

00:18:57.690 --> 00:19:00.430
You know, back in 2004 when iPods were a big

00:19:00.430 --> 00:19:04.049
deal. Darn. Do you remember when iPods were a

00:19:04.049 --> 00:19:07.890
big deal? Yeah, man. Like, people were like,

00:19:07.950 --> 00:19:11.039
oh my god, it's an iPod. Yeah. I was back before

00:19:11.039 --> 00:19:14.700
everybody had a multimedia data storage device

00:19:14.700 --> 00:19:19.700
in their phone. And you had to connect the iPod

00:19:19.700 --> 00:19:24.059
to your computer to download the music. Yeah,

00:19:24.059 --> 00:19:26.480
with that very funky chord. Yeah, with that very

00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:28.799
funky chord. And sometimes you didn't get it.

00:19:29.160 --> 00:19:31.240
I was talking to somebody recently, I can't remember

00:19:31.240 --> 00:19:33.359
who it was, but I was talking to somebody recently,

00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:38.140
and they were telling me they still had an iPod.

00:19:39.109 --> 00:19:42.750
Yeah, they still make them like like he has one

00:19:42.750 --> 00:19:45.250
original one with all of his favorite like his

00:19:45.250 --> 00:19:47.109
old school records are with all of his old school

00:19:47.109 --> 00:19:52.569
albums on in a Nice nice. Yeah, and he showed

00:19:52.569 --> 00:19:54.609
it to me and it was like this you can tell like

00:19:54.609 --> 00:19:57.569
this thing has been worn, dude It's got the wheel

00:19:57.569 --> 00:20:00.470
on it. Everything dude. It's so old school had

00:20:00.470 --> 00:20:03.190
to wheel on it and have like Then it was like

00:20:03.190 --> 00:20:05.170
you can tell was all dirty. I can't clean in

00:20:05.170 --> 00:20:08.509
them And he's like, you know, I love this thing.

00:20:08.569 --> 00:20:11.210
I got all my albums on here. Like he's an albums

00:20:11.210 --> 00:20:13.289
guy, you know what I mean? So he has like, he

00:20:13.289 --> 00:20:15.410
had like however many albums he could fit on

00:20:15.410 --> 00:20:20.009
an iPad, on an iPad, on an iPad. iPod. iPod.

00:20:20.150 --> 00:20:23.069
Yeah. It's filled with all of his albums. Yeah.

00:20:23.910 --> 00:20:25.529
And I remember when they started changing them

00:20:25.529 --> 00:20:27.170
and they started doing like the iPod shuffle

00:20:27.170 --> 00:20:29.869
and all that shit. I was never big into Apple.

00:20:31.819 --> 00:20:36.079
We got a barking dog. We do. We'll see if that

00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:38.019
gets edited out or not. I can see if my editing

00:20:38.019 --> 00:20:41.480
skills can get that out. Yeah. Hopefully I can.

00:20:41.720 --> 00:20:43.859
Yeah, we'll see. We'll see. Or if this Christmas

00:20:43.859 --> 00:20:46.119
episode just got ruined by the dog. Yeah. That's

00:20:46.119 --> 00:20:48.119
cool. It's Christmas time. It's Christmas time.

00:20:48.480 --> 00:20:50.339
We're going to forgive the dog. Yeah, let dogs

00:20:50.339 --> 00:20:52.420
be dogs. We're going to let dogs be dogs. Do

00:20:52.420 --> 00:20:55.380
you get your dog a gift for Christmas? Yeah,

00:20:55.380 --> 00:20:58.160
but she's got like a basket full of toys, so

00:20:58.160 --> 00:21:00.400
we just grab one of the toys out of the basket.

00:21:00.599 --> 00:21:03.880
That she hasn't played with in a while, and give

00:21:03.880 --> 00:21:07.359
it to her like it's new. Well, she's a fucking

00:21:07.359 --> 00:21:11.460
dog. I know, I get it. I get it. I would do the

00:21:11.460 --> 00:21:14.000
same thing. Yeah. I just, today I had, with my

00:21:14.000 --> 00:21:15.880
dog, I had to, she wasn't going to eat her food,

00:21:16.019 --> 00:21:19.180
so I just changed her bowl and put a clean, got

00:21:19.180 --> 00:21:21.960
a clean bowl and put the, and like turned the

00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:25.140
food over. Same food. Yeah, just put it down

00:21:25.140 --> 00:21:27.000
like it was a new paint because she kept looking

00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:28.819
at it like she was gonna eat it But I think she

00:21:28.819 --> 00:21:31.400
was like, oh, it's not it's not fresh. It's not

00:21:31.400 --> 00:21:36.420
fresh. Yeah, and I was like so I You know turn

00:21:36.420 --> 00:21:39.220
the food over or whatever put it in a clean bowl

00:21:39.220 --> 00:21:41.420
Gobbled it all up. Yeah, I did the trick. You

00:21:41.420 --> 00:21:45.720
did the trick. Yeah, so Do you ever have you

00:21:45.720 --> 00:21:47.720
ever been somewhere where somebody just randomly

00:21:47.720 --> 00:21:50.420
says Merry Christmas to you? Like out of nowhere

00:21:50.420 --> 00:21:52.160
like you're walking down the street and all of

00:21:52.160 --> 00:21:54.480
a sudden somebody you don't even know is like

00:21:54.480 --> 00:21:56.700
Merry Christmas Yeah, I think this happened to

00:21:56.700 --> 00:21:59.859
everybody. I like it when it happens like in

00:21:59.859 --> 00:22:05.119
May Right, I Think that's the best time to get

00:22:05.119 --> 00:22:08.819
a Merry Christmas June June June. Yeah, that's

00:22:08.819 --> 00:22:14.119
as far from Christmas as you get June 25th Yeah,

00:22:14.119 --> 00:22:16.819
walk around your date walk around and just whatever

00:22:16.819 --> 00:22:20.119
person you see Just say Merry Christmas. Merry

00:22:20.119 --> 00:22:25.559
Christmas. Happy New Year. I regularly tell people

00:22:25.559 --> 00:22:28.220
happy birthday. Right. Even when it's not their

00:22:28.220 --> 00:22:31.539
birthday? It's almost exclusively to people who

00:22:31.539 --> 00:22:33.759
I barely know and I certainly don't know when

00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:36.900
their birthday is. Nice. But like, if I'm at

00:22:36.900 --> 00:22:39.220
work and I need to pass somebody something, I

00:22:39.220 --> 00:22:41.019
just say happy birthday when I'm giving it to

00:22:41.019 --> 00:22:43.880
them. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I do that kind of shit

00:22:43.880 --> 00:22:46.519
too. Yeah. I'll say, hey, I got a gift for you.

00:22:46.980 --> 00:22:48.630
Yeah. There you go. It's thinking about you.

00:22:48.769 --> 00:22:54.690
Here you go. And it's like, I do that shit to

00:22:54.690 --> 00:22:56.450
my roommate all the time. Hey, I got something

00:22:56.450 --> 00:22:58.869
for you. Hey, I was thinking to you. Yeah. Here

00:22:58.869 --> 00:23:03.009
you go. Dude, it's the PG and email. Yep. Happy

00:23:03.009 --> 00:23:05.289
birthday. You know, it occurs to me is I do that

00:23:05.289 --> 00:23:08.450
enough that every now and then I have to be right.

00:23:08.769 --> 00:23:12.369
Right. You know, Uh, cause everybody has a birthday.

00:23:12.849 --> 00:23:14.970
Yeah. And so every now and then I say, I say

00:23:14.970 --> 00:23:17.809
to a random person who I don't know and who doesn't

00:23:17.809 --> 00:23:20.470
know me, happy birthday on their birthday. And

00:23:20.470 --> 00:23:22.750
that probably throws them a little bit. Like,

00:23:22.849 --> 00:23:25.670
dude, how'd that guy know? Yeah. I don't know

00:23:25.670 --> 00:23:28.549
him that well. That's kind of cool. Yeah. Where

00:23:28.549 --> 00:23:30.910
they get freaked out. They're like that motherfucker

00:23:30.910 --> 00:23:33.369
knows when it's my birthday. That's not cool.

00:23:34.430 --> 00:23:37.450
That's not cool. I don't want that guy to know

00:23:37.450 --> 00:23:40.660
when my, when my birthday is. Yeah. But yeah,

00:23:40.799 --> 00:23:44.180
do you have a? Yeah, that's weird when you're

00:23:44.180 --> 00:23:45.359
walking down the street and somebody just out

00:23:45.359 --> 00:23:48.420
of nowhere says Merry Christmas. I think it was

00:23:48.420 --> 00:23:52.960
more acceptable years ago. Yeah, it's sort of

00:23:52.960 --> 00:23:55.440
like it's like a small town thing, you know,

00:23:55.619 --> 00:23:57.980
we just acknowledge the people on the street.

00:23:58.079 --> 00:24:00.240
Yeah. And if it's Christmas time, you say Merry

00:24:00.240 --> 00:24:03.079
Christmas. Merry Christmas. But even at the same

00:24:03.079 --> 00:24:04.900
time, if it was like Fourth of July, you wouldn't

00:24:04.900 --> 00:24:07.910
say Happy Fourth of July. Or you could say Happy

00:24:07.910 --> 00:24:10.130
Independence Day. You could, but people don't

00:24:10.130 --> 00:24:12.549
walk around saying Happy Independence Day. Yeah,

00:24:12.549 --> 00:24:14.589
that's true enough. They say Happy Christmas

00:24:14.589 --> 00:24:17.869
or Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah or, you

00:24:17.869 --> 00:24:21.289
know, whatever it is they celebrate. Yeah. You

00:24:21.289 --> 00:24:25.710
know. But yeah, I was just at the grocery store.

00:24:25.789 --> 00:24:27.490
The reason I brought it up is I was just at the

00:24:27.490 --> 00:24:29.910
grocery store the other day and I was getting

00:24:29.910 --> 00:24:34.390
something and this old man walked by me out of

00:24:34.390 --> 00:24:37.799
nowhere. And he just walks by me in like a low

00:24:37.799 --> 00:24:39.740
kind of cool kind of tone. It was like, Merry

00:24:39.740 --> 00:24:42.619
Christmas. I was like, Whoa, that was weird.

00:24:42.940 --> 00:24:46.079
All right. Yeah. That was random. Well, sure.

00:24:46.380 --> 00:24:49.160
Hey, a little bit of festive, whatever. I think

00:24:49.160 --> 00:24:51.720
it's cool when you get a, there's a little overboard

00:24:51.720 --> 00:24:53.720
to being festive though. Like I don't get people

00:24:53.720 --> 00:24:57.180
that decorate their cars. Yeah. With Christmas

00:24:57.180 --> 00:25:00.559
lights and shit. Yeah. Like I know friends with

00:25:00.559 --> 00:25:03.250
trucks. that have trucks they drive or whatever,

00:25:03.529 --> 00:25:05.869
and they put like fucking lights all over it.

00:25:06.269 --> 00:25:08.170
Really? Yeah, they put like Christmas lights

00:25:08.170 --> 00:25:11.990
all over it. That's wild. I don't, I don't, I

00:25:11.990 --> 00:25:14.569
don't, I don't. There's no lights on the house

00:25:14.569 --> 00:25:16.869
either, and there's not gonna be, because that's

00:25:16.869 --> 00:25:20.210
the whole fucking thing, man. Right. I mean,

00:25:20.309 --> 00:25:22.829
we'll have a tree, right, but we don't go like,

00:25:22.970 --> 00:25:24.690
like some people in our neighborhood go like

00:25:24.690 --> 00:25:27.670
way overboard and have a whole scene. You know

00:25:27.670 --> 00:25:29.609
what I mean? With the lights and everything,

00:25:29.869 --> 00:25:31.990
like Christmas exploded in front of somebody's

00:25:31.990 --> 00:25:35.109
house. There's a guy in the neighborhood who

00:25:35.109 --> 00:25:38.730
does a bunch of inflatable Christmas characters,

00:25:40.289 --> 00:25:46.109
and he would do Christmas Star Wars on the front

00:25:46.109 --> 00:25:49.859
lawn and stuff. Right. Just fun. But I ain't

00:25:49.859 --> 00:25:52.000
doing that. I ain't doing that either. I ain't

00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:54.200
doing that shit, no. I'm not doing that at all.

00:25:54.359 --> 00:25:57.339
That's just a whole fucking thing. The one that,

00:25:57.440 --> 00:26:00.859
the one, yeah, I got a, yeah, I know a friend

00:26:00.859 --> 00:26:03.119
of mine has been posting it on his Instagram.

00:26:03.819 --> 00:26:05.579
And it's like, dude, day after Thanksgiving,

00:26:05.880 --> 00:26:09.480
his whole house is Christmas. Dude, it's the

00:26:09.480 --> 00:26:11.880
day after Thanksgiving. You can't wait till like

00:26:11.880 --> 00:26:16.759
December, December 10th. Yep. Like if you wait

00:26:16.759 --> 00:26:19.299
till December 10th. I'd accept it. I mean, if

00:26:19.299 --> 00:26:21.619
you just wait till December, period. Yeah. It's

00:26:21.619 --> 00:26:23.839
like one day, two days, you gotta wait. Like,

00:26:23.859 --> 00:26:25.859
what, Thanksgiving was on the 25th or whatever?

00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:29.859
Yeah. 26, 27, 28, 29, 30. Five days, you gotta

00:26:29.859 --> 00:26:34.819
wait. Yeah. Five days. It ain't that hard. But

00:26:34.819 --> 00:26:38.000
you don't gotta let Christmas explode. Yeah,

00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:41.940
but they do. On November 27th. They fucking prematurely

00:26:41.940 --> 00:26:46.180
ejaculate Christmas just all over the whole everyone

00:26:46.180 --> 00:26:49.180
they meet. And good for them. I guess their spirits

00:26:49.180 --> 00:26:52.279
in the right place. Is it? Because when you put

00:26:52.279 --> 00:26:54.880
it the way I just put it. Right. It's pretty

00:26:54.880 --> 00:26:58.400
inconsiderate. I mean, are they doing it? But

00:26:58.400 --> 00:27:00.299
do you think they're doing it because they really

00:27:00.299 --> 00:27:02.059
like Christmas or are they doing it because they're

00:27:02.059 --> 00:27:06.160
like, oh, look at me. I'm so festive. No, I think

00:27:06.160 --> 00:27:07.759
they do it because they really like Christmas.

00:27:07.839 --> 00:27:10.460
See, I can accept that. But I don't accept it

00:27:10.460 --> 00:27:13.900
if you're doing it on November 26. I don't know

00:27:13.900 --> 00:27:17.339
why. Don't ask me why. I don't get it. But I

00:27:17.339 --> 00:27:19.140
think if you're gonna do it, you want Christmas

00:27:19.140 --> 00:27:22.720
to explode all over your house, do it on December

00:27:22.720 --> 00:27:27.559
1st. I think that it's acceptable. It's like

00:27:27.559 --> 00:27:31.160
a bare minimum of restraint. Yeah. Just to keep

00:27:31.160 --> 00:27:33.319
Christmas in December. Yeah, it's like Halloween

00:27:33.319 --> 00:27:36.079
people that fucking decorate their fucking house

00:27:36.079 --> 00:27:40.859
for Halloween on September 30th. You know what

00:27:40.859 --> 00:27:43.119
I mean? Thanksgiving don't get no decorations.

00:27:43.319 --> 00:27:45.140
Why doesn't Thanksgiving get no decorations?

00:27:45.519 --> 00:27:47.579
Thanksgiving gets decorations. You can put out

00:27:47.579 --> 00:27:50.880
a cornucopia. Because the Indians and pilgrims

00:27:50.880 --> 00:27:55.079
had those. But you can't. But you don't like

00:27:55.079 --> 00:27:57.319
go by somebody's house and there's a big inflatable

00:27:57.319 --> 00:27:58.779
turkey in front of their house. You know what

00:27:58.779 --> 00:28:00.859
I mean? Oh, you do. In this neighborhood, you

00:28:00.859 --> 00:28:03.089
do. Do you? Yeah. I've never seen somebody with

00:28:03.089 --> 00:28:05.349
a big inflatable turkey in front of their house.

00:28:05.690 --> 00:28:07.769
The same people that had the inflatable Star

00:28:07.769 --> 00:28:09.890
Wars Christmas. Yeah. They have an inflatable

00:28:09.890 --> 00:28:12.170
turkey. Right. Yeah. So is it like every holiday

00:28:12.170 --> 00:28:14.970
with them? Uh, pretty much. Yeah. Do they go

00:28:14.970 --> 00:28:19.230
big on 4th of July too? Yeah. As long as you're

00:28:19.230 --> 00:28:22.230
consistent with going big, I'll be okay with

00:28:22.230 --> 00:28:26.509
it. Yeah. They, they don't go big on... Labor

00:28:26.509 --> 00:28:33.180
day? Labor day. Uh... So, you know, make of that

00:28:33.180 --> 00:28:35.660
what you will. I don't think anybody decorates

00:28:35.660 --> 00:28:38.680
on Labor Day. No. I think everybody's just like,

00:28:38.700 --> 00:28:40.119
thank God we don't have to go to work today.

00:28:40.200 --> 00:28:41.839
What do you want to do? Put a bunch of extra

00:28:41.839 --> 00:28:44.859
work on yourself for Labor Day? No, thank you.

00:28:45.279 --> 00:28:47.180
You just want to chill out back and barbecue.

00:28:47.420 --> 00:28:52.460
Yeah. That's cool. That's cool. But yeah, man,

00:28:52.500 --> 00:28:54.240
however you celebrate Christmas, I hope it's

00:28:54.240 --> 00:28:57.339
a good holiday this year. Yeah. You know, if

00:28:57.339 --> 00:29:01.460
you don't celebrate Christmas. Well, that's on

00:29:01.460 --> 00:29:04.799
you. That is on you. Which is, and there's nothing

00:29:04.799 --> 00:29:07.279
wrong with that. Nothing wrong with that. There's

00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:09.140
plenty of people who don't celebrate Christmas.

00:29:09.240 --> 00:29:13.359
I spent a long time being like that. Bah humbug

00:29:13.359 --> 00:29:17.339
to Christmas. Yeah. I mean, I always like did

00:29:17.339 --> 00:29:20.940
it for, and I still do honestly, do it because

00:29:20.940 --> 00:29:23.640
there's people in my life who celebrate Christmas.

00:29:23.660 --> 00:29:26.640
Right. And so I'll celebrate it with them for

00:29:26.640 --> 00:29:29.039
them. Right. That's kind of why I do it at this

00:29:29.039 --> 00:29:31.779
point. Yeah. Like, I'm not a guy that's gonna

00:29:31.779 --> 00:29:34.779
go out and, like, buy a bunch of decorations

00:29:34.779 --> 00:29:36.799
and stuff, you know what I mean? I'm not gonna

00:29:36.799 --> 00:29:39.579
spend eight hours of my day decorating my house.

00:29:39.740 --> 00:29:41.599
Yeah. You know what I mean? I'm gonna throw up

00:29:41.599 --> 00:29:45.079
a tree, you know? Put some presents underneath

00:29:45.079 --> 00:29:50.059
it. And, like, be done. Yeah. Send out gift cards

00:29:50.059 --> 00:29:53.000
for presents. Mm -hmm. That's my Christmas shopping.

00:29:53.119 --> 00:29:56.539
Yeah. Simple. Yeah. I don't know if we're complicated,

00:29:56.599 --> 00:29:59.180
but if you go big on Christmas, good for you.

00:29:59.619 --> 00:30:02.319
Good for you. Good for you. Good for you. I think

00:30:02.319 --> 00:30:04.319
that's going to do it, man. All right. I think

00:30:04.319 --> 00:30:06.099
I think that's a good enough episode. That's

00:30:06.099 --> 00:30:08.819
it. 30 minutes. Yeah. You're done. I like it.

00:30:09.599 --> 00:30:12.700
It's quick. If you listened all the way through,

00:30:12.700 --> 00:30:15.079
we appreciate you. Yeah, we did a Christmas episode

00:30:15.079 --> 00:30:17.720
where we didn't go dark. We didn't go dark. We

00:30:17.720 --> 00:30:20.819
didn't do a lot of swearing. Which is fine. Which

00:30:20.819 --> 00:30:23.099
is good. We're grownups. We don't have to swear.

00:30:23.480 --> 00:30:26.720
But we didn't go dark. So thank God it didn't

00:30:26.720 --> 00:30:30.299
get all morbid and weird for you. Yeah. So. If

00:30:30.299 --> 00:30:31.920
you listen all the way through wherever you listen

00:30:31.920 --> 00:30:34.640
to this podcast, please leave us a review. You

00:30:34.640 --> 00:30:37.000
know, give us some stars or give us what thumbs

00:30:37.000 --> 00:30:39.839
up or whatever. Uh, visit our website, shane

00:30:39.839 --> 00:30:44.220
and I show .com. Uh, all that good stuff. Yeah,

00:30:44.460 --> 00:30:46.980
do it. Uh, you could leave us a voicemail. I

00:30:46.980 --> 00:30:49.779
checked out. It works. You can leave us a voicemail

00:30:49.779 --> 00:30:52.660
on shane and I show .com. We will play it on

00:30:52.660 --> 00:30:56.640
the air as long as it's within reason. Yeah.

00:30:57.559 --> 00:30:59.660
If you want to donate something to the show,

00:31:00.059 --> 00:31:02.279
a couple bucks here, a couple bucks there, whatever,

00:31:02.619 --> 00:31:04.400
you can do it at the website. That would be helpful.

00:31:04.500 --> 00:31:07.240
This thing ain't free. And if you want to get

00:31:07.240 --> 00:31:10.059
these episodes delivered to you before they're,

00:31:10.059 --> 00:31:13.079
you know, released everywhere else, sign up for

00:31:13.079 --> 00:31:15.500
our email and they get dropped right in your

00:31:15.500 --> 00:31:20.710
inbox. Yeah. Until next time, people. Don't be

00:31:20.710 --> 00:31:22.990
a dick. Don't be a dick and enjoy your Christmas.

00:31:23.130 --> 00:31:26.349
Yeah, happy holidays. Merry Christmas